Why Hoarders are shy and try to hide!

Hi Guys,

Well, I haven't written for a while now, as I have just started a new job! 

Finally, after 5 months of looking I now have my dream job.  After I catch up on debts, I will be able to 'pay' others to get my work of decluttering done more easily and with less stress involved for me.

This new Dashboard 'blog' look is very useful.  I get to see how many have read my blog and an overview from where! 

At first I thought I was writing to myself only.  Now it appears there are those out there as far as Alaska reading about my efforts to declutter my 'stuff'. 

Why I can say we are a shy lot --- and those who know me know that I am NOT shy --- but when it comes to my clutter I do get very 'antsy' for a better word, when someone says they are coming to visit me!!!  Now that sends shock waves right through me and into such a dither that I just want to go and hide away somewhere till it is all over.  They don't know that it was double trouble and has taken me over 5 years to get to this point in my decluttering!  All they will see is the 'mess' and not the 'progress'! 

This is where I find myself 'explaining' my situation.  Invariably, all say 'don't worry about it'.  But, hey, guys, get real... we will still worry and fret.

It even happened to me in reverse the other day as I was to meet up with friends and ended up with me visiting a friend who was at another friends house.  The friend's friend was saying 'no no no' in the background (we were on a mobile/cell call) and thankfully my friend said she was not keen on me seeing how her 'home' looked.  To which I said 'she should see mine'!!!  I did end up there and I did manage to settle her nerves, fears and worries and told her of my situation and she relaxed.  And to be quite honest we were on par and just goes to show there are many of us out there struggling in silence alone, which is so unnecessary. 

This is why I decided to not hide any longer.  We can find comfort and solace in communicating with each other who understand the struggle.  Instead of hiding, we should come out bold as and help ourselves and each other without the shame and judgement that is always there in the air lingering like a bad smell.

Why I also say we are a shy lot is some have found me on facebook and communicated with me directly their horrendous problems that would be difficult to overcome.  Yet, not one person has commented on my blog directly.  I can understand this as that would then highlight that you may have the same issue.  I decided long ago to not worry too much about what others think and let it as they say in comedy's 'let it all hang out'!

Till then I lived in shame and horror against judgement about my plight and situation by those who were judging without knowing the full story.  This is human.  This is normal. This is what we ALL do, even me.  One day I will be brave enough to place photos of my progress... those photos that I have dared to take.  Like as if there is no evidence then no one will be the wiser and I can easily fool myself and whitewash it much more easily that it never really existed.

So if you do feel so inclined to chime in, whether you have a struggle with 'stuff' or not, please do.  As this is a forum to help each other where all judgment is left out of the equation.  Not one person has ridiculed me for writing about my journey.  If anything, I have had only pure support, which has helped me enormously.

So please try not to be shy.

Onto my next efforts, which is that I have a 'hard rubbish' collection the local council organises once a year where I live. 

My adult daughter will help, but lord knows in what state she will be in seeing she only got in around 3am. 

My teenage son is to help also.  And again lord knows in what state as he is still at a 'sleep over' at a mates place overnight and that usually means one cranky dude rocks up.  This time he is bringing a mate along to help as well.  So two cranky dudes.  Oh what fun.

My saviour will more than likely be the last minute offer of help from a longtime and dearest girlfriend. 

I am sure between the sleepyheads and the two of us shall fill the nature strip (curb for those in the US etc) in no time.

Then I have to get the yard ready for tree lopping and clearing.  It is all taking shape.

After getting the weeds in the front yard removed, surprisingly people in the street began smiling and commenting as they walked passed my home.  All very friendly all of a sudden! 

Also, a few of my friends felt compelled to tell me they drove passed my place as they no longer recognised it!  Now I do think that is going too far... no matter how funny it is... no all in good humour.  At least this means I am making progress, as slow as it is.

Now all I have to do is kill the grass, clover and wondering dew and after a while, now thanks to my new job, get a crap load of mulch to suppress the regrowth.  I have 'Wild Iris's' to mass plant and they should clump out for a low maintenance garden bed in our dry aussie harsh climate.

This shot was taken not long after the weeding of the front and side.  If you take a careful look under the carport you will see what is left to be sorted through.  Not ideal as it is cold in winter and one does not feel like sorting out in the elements, which tends to halt my progress.  Even though I look like that british show from years gone by, 'Steptoe & Son', under the carport, it is the only area I have to store the 'stuff'.  At least it is all in one place now.  But there is more inside to be dealt with as well... the carport is not the only area to be dealt with by any stretch of the imagination.
 
Wish me well with the 'hard rubbish' today that I will be dealing with shortly.  Will try and take a photo as a momento to remind me that I am 'getting there'.

Happy decluttering everyone and will check in soon with more updates.

Cheers to one and all
from one 'getting' very happy Anita