Hi Guys,
My daughter is now all moved out and as life has it I am now busy for the next 4 weekends in a row.
How on earth am I going to manage to move into that spare room? I could, but it needs to be painted first while it is relatively empty. This is where one has to have a lot of patience. Time, duties, work and commitments get in the way of doing what you really want to do.
My daughter and her bloke came over last night and we will be going to see some dear friends from way back when who I haven't seen for some years next Saturday together and then after that we will get stuck into the room.
At long last we have a Paint Date!
First, I have to decide on colours and buy said paint, brushes, rollers and so on to be ready to start next Saturday! I have heaps of Sugar Soap and my son and I will start washing down the walls tomorrow.
All very excitement if you ask me.
Once the room is done, dry and dusted and the bed and so forth are in place it will be my old room's turn next. This one I will be eager to get done as this is where the Sulcs Domino Effect truely takes shape. I hope to get this one painted as soon as possible to then set up the study room that then means I get the dining table back at last.
In my mind the house is starting to look pretty good and even good enough to start having visitors over! BBQ anyone? Maybe later.
This is already sounding time consuming and only looks like happening in October. Would be nice to have this all sorted by Christmas. I was hoping to have at least the boxes under the carport sorted before this, but now doesn't look likely. I have to rethink my timeframe.
Must remember to breathe in breathe out and take it in my stride. No point stressing and putting myself under undue pressure. I want to make sure I do it once by doing it properly first time round.
Afterall it is just 'stuff'.
I did see that 60 Minutes programme had a severe hoarder featured a week or so ago. I did watch parts of it, but this poor chappy was to the Richter scale extreme case of hoarding. He really was trying to hold onto his families love. Very sad. I also could see in him all the classic hallmarks of a hoarder.
The trouble with hoarders is we see use in most things or dislike waste and are the original ones that really recycled or being spendthrifty. Now what could be wrong with that? Plenty when it gets out of hand. When the scales tip over into being a tip. Not a good feeling. One mixed with loss and heartache in there.
The trick is to know what to and what not to hang onto! With the disclaimer of as long as you have the room to store it appropriately.
Being that I had alot of stuff to start off with when I inherited all of my Mum's stuff along with mounds of material and knitting wool that was Grandmum's as well is what tipped me over the edge into the abyss of a hoarders hell.
I don't blame my Mum or my Grandmum. It is what it is. There should be no blame, just understanding.
I understand that Grandmum was forced to walk away from all her worldly possessions due to WWII and had just a few items by the time she got through that War, Displacement Persons Camp in Germany to when she arrived here in WA, Australia all those years ago. To her, what she accrued was her wealth and didn't want to lose it again and didn't want to spend unnecessary extra dollars on items you already had. I come from an ethnic family that recycled everything before it was know as recycled. We see use in everything. To me it was normal for stockings to have 10 uses and so on. Nothing gets or got wasted and kept for that rainy day just in case.
I understand that Mum was of the same ilk as Grandmum, but by the time she inherited her Mum's stuff she was in her late 60s and felt overwhelmed by the sheer volume of stuff. My Mum fully intended to go through it all and I watched while helping her to just struggle with this, but it all became too much. The difference is my Mum packed it in such a way that it was neatly crammed in. So it didn't appear to be too much. The line between her stuff and what she kept of her mothers became blurred. She even took a male friends stuff as she couldn't bear the thought of it being tossed. Now that task of finding his family to pass on his few treasures and photos is left to me to do.
Mum knew what a daunting task she was passing onto me and what I was about to go through and encounter. While she was in palliative she constantly would say to me with tears in her eyes how sorry she was that she didn't get the time to deal with it herself and had left it for me. Really, it should have been Grandmum that dealt with it. But like I said, there is no blame here. It is what it is. Mum knew that my one sister was going to put me through hell with the Will and with all the stuff on top of it along with 2 children with one with medical needs and an ex who left me high and dry that I had too much on my plate to soon be dealing with it all alone.
Ready or not I got what I got. I got an older sister who I love die not long after Mum died. I got the other older sister who was vile and toxic towards me without thought for anything other than herself. I got to be all alone without the emotional support that I had been blessed with till then. I got to come to terms with and work past the overwhelming sheer volume of stuff that I was presented with and live amongst. I had no other choice. I got to know who really loves you. I got to know who lives the truth to your face.
In other words I got to grow up.
It was either that or wallow and I wasn't about to go there.
This journey has lasted longer that I would have hoped. I am so glad that I got to tell Mum that it was OK that I got to do all the work and am glad that I did as now looking back, no matter how hard it has been and it has been, I know Mum is resting peacefully knowing she left her worldly possessions in good hands to be dealt with love.
I am glad that I get to do what Mum would have found far more difficult than me to do. All the material, christmas paper, knitting wool and so on would still be here if Mum was still alive. Of this I am sure. All has gone to the Salvation Army long ago. There are some items I wish I hadn't gotten rid of I will admit, but I don't dwell on that as much any more. I use this when going through what is now so that I don't regret. Amazingly, this has meant I toss more not less. True!
This massive learning curve thrust upon me has in some ways been the best and worst thing in my life. I do not, nor care to unwish it. The only thing I would wish for is the energy required to do what is left in a shorter time. A gal can wish can't she?
Well there you go. Next week will be the painting duds on and roller up and start cutting in with the brushes.
All systems a go...
Chiz all
Anita who will have her tool belt on very soon!
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