As promised I haven't left too big a gap in time to write about my 'stuff'.
Haven't bothered to ask before, but it would be interesting to know how many that do read my blog have the same or similar issues that I have had since gaining my overload, or avalanche of 'stuff'.
Did it happen slowly.
Did it start after a stressful time.
Is something that you got landed with all of a sudden.
Did you find yourself in a relationship with one who has these issues.
No matter the reason how, when, where or why it still happened and it still sucks big time.
Ready or not it is not an easy issue to deal with once the ball starts rolling down that proverbial hill that then feels like Mt. Everest.
Time made it happen and time is what is needed to unravel from it also.
I am now about to set off into a whole new career. Thought the last one was going to be 'it'. But 'it' and the economy have other ideas. The job that I had as a Pharmacy Sales Representative meant I had 'stuff' called sample product in storage along with pamphlets and other items for shelves and window displays and so on in my home. Plus all the paperwork and training material that went with them. Yes, you guessed it, this on top of my inherited 'stuff'.
Totally the worst career one could have who already had too much 'stuff' and a storage issue to boot.
Now that I have accepted that the pharmaceutical world is in a bit of a downer turn, I have had to look elsewhere for employment.
I participated in a course recently that was far too simple for my skills and I learnt nothing. I did, however, help the Trainer in assisting and helping my fellow students with the said information. I was annoyed at the time that I had wasted my time. Or so I thought. The Trainer had in the meantime, put my name forward to be a Trainer and have since been offered to do another course, this time the other end of the spectrum and extremely full on and difficult, so I can then qualify as a Trainer and Assessor, which apparently is a much sought after Certificate.
Hence, the opportunity for purging. I am no longer holding onto this material as support for any future pharmaceutical positions. This will mean a huge chunk will be out in the recylce bins. This is an easy one and means the overload will diminish so much faster.
It has now been over 6 years since the real serious start to my decluttering and downsizing began. I have learnt that it doesn't happen overnight. I have also realised that you have to keep your humour and be kind to yourself while going through this what seems to be a very slow process when the task ahead is so gargantuan and appears unachievable at first.
I have bravely posted photos to push me further. Once out there I just had to do it. If this helps then I totally encourage one to do the same. We are all capable of being complacent. Some more than others. Do whatever it takes. You know you better than any one else.
For those who do not have this issue yet and if ever, I have heard privately from those who have always had pristine homes with clear bench tops and clear corridors and one day overnight when several elderly relatives passed, found themselves in overload with duties that they had never considered before having to do and were quite angry with the one's who had died and left it all to them. I try to explain they are for a start at least 20 years younger and more energetic than the dearly departed. I also point out if left all alone and no one visited them then what point was there to keep the place 'nice'. Also as people age so does their eyesight and they don't always see the space like a younger person does. There may have been a multitude of reasons why, but why be angry now. What's done is done. Anger and judgement achieve nothing.
There is always a reason why it happens.
Clutter is a perception by some as one item to the other end of the spectrum to not being able to open a door to a room and so on.
Instead of getting bogged down in accusations and once it happens, try to help those you see going down that road well before that happen,s as usually it means they cannot cope and need the assistance. If they refuse to let go of things that you think mean nothing, then be kind about how you get that elder person to let go. It may take time, but tackle one section at a time with them. For example, one drawer that can hardly be pulled open. You empty the contents and sort into the obvious titles - precious, sentimental, useful and still used, might come in handy and the last being broken, chipped or torn, which essentially will be the rubbish pile and to be tossed. You then place back the items up to still used and if the draw is full you then say the handy goes to charity and anything from broken to tossed gets placed in the rubbish bin at your place and not theirs as they may be tempted to take a peek and retrieve what has been tossed.
This is only when the problem is starting that this usually works. Once you get way passed this point there is no point.
I myself have struggled and that is partly due to feeling overwhelmed by what I had to do and knowing how long it was going to take - and that was forever. Also, I was grieving. I was grieving the many close much loved persons I lost from my life. Some of my friends understood this and some didn't. I have worked through what I have had to and become the new me and in having allowed myself that time to process my emotions I can see that I am better able to let more items or 'stuff' go. No need to be traumatised.
You wont know how long this process will end up taking, but be assured it usually is longer than you at first estimate. That is why you have to be kind to yourself. I cannot state that enough.
Many know the reasons why people hold onto things.
One being they lived through the war years where there was shortage of everything.
Another, being living on the bread line or lived in poverty.
Another can be simply security of knowing you wont have to buy it.
Mending things has gone out of fashion. I remember darning my socks at a young age with my wooden mushroom. Who does that any more. I now have 3 such wooden mushrooms. Do I throw them out or keep them. I remember my Mum unravelling old jumpers to wash that wool till it was straight once more to be reknitted into some other useful item. Nothing went to waste. Be it food, clothes or hardware like wood, crockery etc. We had fruit trees and grew vegetables and pickled them and made jams that got stored. I remember when plastic bags came about and yes you guessed it they were used to be mini hot houses or such for the vegie patch. Stocking were used to tie up the taller plants. Everything was recycled in my parents household and generations before them. So my issue was a generational thing and handed down to me due to my culture. All about saving the penny. Why spend if you don't have to.
My parents just did not understand this throw away society.
I have stopped going to the markets for the moment so I can organise my stuff into sections. Such as a day of all materials, a day of all christmas stuff, a day of all toys and so on and start again in late October to get into the pre Christmas spirit. Now that the election is over and people were hanging onto their hard earneds for dear life there may be some who have now relaxed their grip on their purse strings. At least I am hoping.
Back to my new future job as a Trainer and Assessor which will start next year and has meant there now is a silver lining to having embraced yet another new career. And that lining is, I get to purge and toss more 'stuff' out.
Now that is a good thing.
Till next time, just remember it is not what others think that matters, for they may also go through this in their families future and we can only concentrate on our selves first and foremost. Just think of you and what you can do and go with that plan. Even if it means it will take years to get there. Document it via photos and you will be amazed looking back how much you really have achieved. Otherwise, you will keep on thinking you haven't done much and think what's the point, when you actually have done much.
No one knows what we will encounter in our lives. No one can be sure.
One thing I am sure of is that I am letting it go... albeit bit by bit by bit.
And a bit is better than nothing.
Cheers to you all and happy to be an ear if you need
Anita
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