Hi guys,
This is the first and official opening of a hoarders blog... Will try and get this to link into Facebook eventually, but will need time to get to that.
In the meantime, I think it is time for those of us who have 'too much stuff of any sort' to place a positive spin on the name or word 'HOARDER'!
Most of the time no one would know who you are or even know you like to keep or collect or find it just that little bit harder to let go. However, when the scales tip too far one way due to some unforseen event/s - then every one feels entitled to let you know what they think. Do I go into someone's home and say 'Ohhh, how sterile' or 'Hmmm, don't have much!' or a glance that just lets you know. Hell no!
In light of this it is time to destigmatise the word 'HOARDER'. There are many levels of hoarding and many ways to help without making one feel ashamed. We can have fun you know. So here is a hoarder who wants to support other hoarders through the maze of unloading in a fun positive manner.
After all it is just a process. For some it will take longer than others and we all don't have a TV crew to sweep in for a weekend and voila - instant no mess! It just doesn't happen that way in the real world.
My favourite quote in the regard is "This is not clutter! These are my antiques!'
I was trying to think of positive names for a group where people could share their stories and support each other through a difficult period of 'decluttering' etc. Here are some of them...
- 20 box your way to feel unloaded.
- How to let go without feeling guilty!
- How to outwit the hoarder within...
- Hoarding got me here - Now how to get out!
- Is your hoarding getting the better of you?
- If a person from a 100 sq home had to move into an 11 sq home - does that meant they instantly become a hoarder also? - this one is a tad long and a work in progress...
The reason for this blog is to show that those that don't keep things that those that do are no different in many ways to them. I myself cannot understand minimalism. It just doesn't compute. It all started from having lots of stuff myself, then storing others gear and then moving in to look after a parent who also had an enormous amount of stuff kept over the years along with their Mum's stuff after they passed on along with some other deceased guys gear. Now how the hell do you minimise from 5 households down to one manageable unit in a small home while living in it and looking after a gravely ill person and children to boot with no support. No mean feat, but have managed to unload alot so far, but much more to still go. But this has not happened without heaps of angst and heartache over the last 4 years. Most of my friends understood to a point and were wonderful. But I can only expect or accept so much from them as they have their own lives to lead. There comes a time when you have to take charge and when that time comes you do know it.
I love giving and knowing that it may or will help others makes it that more easier to purge and release. I even took to taking a photo of some precious thing that had a fond memory attached in order to let the item go. Those in the ravages of these current floods have no choice in the matter - the waters swept their lives from under them. So I plod on toward that picture perfect home I have in my minds eye.
I hope that this will help others to know that we shouldn't feel ashamed. That we just feel things differently and what is so wrong with that. Yes, if what you have is rotting - then that is not good. Yes, if what you have harbours rats, cockroaches and mice etc - then again that is not good also. Yes, if what you have means you or anyone cannot get around to do your usual daily activities etc - then once more that is not good. It is before anyone gets to this point that I am talking about and wish to debunk.
Feel free to chime in and comment - hopefully more in the positve or witty vane. This is meant to be helpful not harmful.
I am now into 4 years of decluttering. It took only a few years prior to that to tip the scales of imbalance and then it was an avalanche. The way in is just as hard as the way out.
How I started was really quite simply - one box at a time - one shelf at a time - one corner at a time. Then cry a little more - then one more box a day later - another tear - another shelf - another day and slowly slowly it starts to change.
While one is in the process of decluttering you do get into what I call a 'holding pattern' of looking as it in a bigger mess. This is part of the process. It means things are moving on out. For some it seems important to handle an item once. This is good if one can achieve it, but I don't dwell on it if I don't get to do that as I know it is one its way out anyway. So I look at the positive rather than beat myself up over it.
It is a process that takes time... and everyones timeline will vary... it is when others look on and perceive that you 'look like' you have done nothing when in fact you have been a very busy beaver that the hurt comes into play. You know you have filled that rubbish bin with precious memories, but appears no one else believes you. This is where you have to keep on like a Berger Paint and just slog on and one day the doubters begin to see the light. Literally!
Again, it is a process... again, one that takes time and perserverence against those that keep on putting you down.
There is so much more that I could share right now. I shall leave that for another day. Even if I chat to myself - then my 'self' will get to finish the job I started with this blogs support, help and assistance. And if anyone joins in on the way then all the better.
Cheers from an almost liberated hoarder
Anita
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