Who came first! The Tortoise or the Hare?

Hi Guys,

Well we all know who won that race now, don't we! 

I have procrastinated throughout this whole last month regarding all things to do with decluttering. 

The finalising of the Will and then the settlement all took it's toll on me.  That and the weather suddenly turned decidedly icy cold.  Never bodes well for enthusiasm.

I am not sure which one I am.  The Tortoise?  Or the Hare?  More likely the Hare as I have run around and gotten nothing done.  Sound familiar?

I have been so busy with everything else except decluttering that I have decided that I resembled the Hare.  But how could I?  All that precious time, gone, wasted.

First off, the State Revenue Office sat on the Title for some weeks and finally stamped it 'non-dutable'.  Now that was a relief. 

Secondly, the settlement had to be booked in, which went like clock work last week.

Now the 2 recipients will receive their cheques and that will be the end of that chapter.  Done and dusted.  This also means all my debts are now consolidated into one home loan.  I can breathe once more.

There have been so many surprising incidental costs, which are still adding up and eating away at my so called buffer.  Well, I suppose I had that buffer for a reason, didn't I?  I am still waiting on one more cost before I start planning what to do first.  Heating in the house for the first time in years or the Hot Water Service.  Being that winter is upon us, I have no doubt heating will win out first.

I will also finally intern Mum and Dad's ashes out at the family cemetery plot. 

I plan to get an organiser in to help me with the kitchen and last part of the lounge room.  Along with a trusty gardener to get the triffids back in line. 

In the meantime, I have finally sorted through all the guff Centrelink had me do and have had a few job interviews.

As you can see I have had 'NO time for DECLUTTERING'!  Still actively being done in my brain however!

It is a nice feeling to know that these bricks and mortar within which I live now belong to me.  This big mess is now truly all mine.  Somehow, this does change the way I feel and it has been a relief to have the Will finished finally.  Bring on the new chapter.  No more bitterness.  No more negativity.  From here on in only sincere friendly people in my life.  I have released the few toxic persons from my family ranks and have let them go for my own health.  Incredibly satisfying moment and one that I am still savouring.

Goodbye crapola and Hello world.

I have a job interview today and it is looking very good.  Just to put a spanner into my plans this one is full time.  Yep, I better get a jiggle on with all my crapola then!

Zigis did get that 16th birthday bash at Luna Park and a good day was had by all.

The crew outside Luna Park 'just for fun' St. Kilda.

Da boys before being let loose.

Proud Mama.

Big sis.

That Carousel.

Aija and Keith organised a unique gift for Zigis.  They got a street sign made up in his name, which was made by the official company that makes all street signs for Victoria.  All we have to find now is a street or way to attach it to!

Way to go Zigis! 

Zigis was very happy to say the least.  He spent all day and well into the night with his mates.  The pain has been well worth it.

As for the garden, well now that I have a little cash on the side, I will have to get quotes and start doing one job at a time to get the garden back on track and more in line with LOW maintenance in mind.

I am ready to purge, but just don't have the energy to do it. 

Just called a professional organiser who is coming this Friday.  I will see how the first 4 or 5 hour block goes and may need to do more over a period of time.  Now I am excited.

Well, my work is done for today.  I like this 'let the fingers do the work' for you. 

Anyone who says money doesn't bring you happiness needs a serious reality check.  It certainly helps to bring comfort, stability and choice into the equation.

As for Kim who is coming to start my decluttering once more, I will get her to help me in the kitchen and lounge areas.  I think she is in for a big surprise.  Or not.  We shall see.  Hope I achieve what I want, which is a pleasant easy going home again.  One that reflects that lived in family feel like I used to have.  I can dream can't I?

Well folks there you have it.  Will take photos of the before and afters for you to see.  I guess we will attack it one section at a time.  Should be interesting.  Kind of scary allowing a total stranger to help you.  On the other hand it has less strings attached.  Hopefully soon this house will be liberated of the stuff that is consuming it and be a home once more within the next few months.

That next chapter has begun.

Will do a blog after her first visit.

Chookas for now,
Anita

ps... just breathe in breathe out... getting prepared for that next step... leap... jump... oh you know what I mean.

Avoidance! The natural enemy of a hoarder!

Hi Guys,

Now I don't mean to sound glum, but this 'decluttering' or 'purging' is the worst roller coaster ride I have ever been on.  It seems to be going on forever and ever. 

My positivity is taking a nose dive big time due to 'too' much time on my hands now!  Now this may sound like an oxymoron, but with more time comes 'avoidance'.  The less time you have the more you do and vise-versa.  And avoidance can happen or be achieved in so many ways, especially when the walls come crashing down around you.

Since quitting the 'love' job, I have been busy, but on everyone else but myself. 

First, I had to defrag myself from the treachery I just got out from under.  I have helped friends who don't have cars to get things done.  There have been events to attend and duties to perform outside of the home.  Then on top of all this I got the virus from hell!  All of which have taken me away from the essential important task at hand.  My home and getting the crap out of here!!!

I find myself at the door of Easter to only have sorted the lounge room somewhat and not enough to be properly utilised yet again for it's intended use. 

The definition of avoid is to shun, keep away from, refrain from, ditch, escape from, bypass, circumvent, dodge, duck, elude, evade, prevent, shirk, sidestep.  Clearly I am an expert avoider!

Opposite to the definition of avoid is embrace as in to approach, contact, confront, face (yeeks), find, pursue, seek out, solicit.  Or just do it!  Clearly I have ceased to embrace this.

However, my recent setbacks have affected me more than I care to admit. 

Allow me to go back to just after my last posting. 

I was advised at that time that I had the Title to Mum's house.  I had in my brain that it was being held at the Law firm that did my Mum's Will.  I called to state as such only to be told that in March 2008 I signed for the Title.  Why in their right mind would they allow 'ME' to do that!  There must have been a good reason.  None of which come to me right now.

Thinking of all the papers that have been thrown out since then I started to panic.  Remember, my passport was thrown out the very same way years before.  To get a replacement Title takes months and many hoops to be jumped through, so to say that I was beside myself was an understatement.

I asked the assistant lawyer to send me an example of the title via email and proceeded to rummage through more paperwork that day for hours till around midnight.  I tossee as I went through.  But no luck.  No Title.  I was spent.  I didn't sleep.  I received the email the next day and in it was also a reminder to look into any Safe Deposit Envelopes that I held at the bank.  Which I did.  Could it be there?

A very weary me got up the next morning and went to said bank and waited to look in this envelope that held many precious papers of family importance.  Documents dating back to the turn of the century... the one before that is!  I leaf through with my heart in my mouth taking my time and there at the bottom was a paper turned upside down and as I held my breath ever so hard, I turned it over to have relief spill through me as I saw the shiny emblem and the word Title. 

I raced said Title to the Law firm in the city that very day.  You would think that was it.  Hell no.  I had to sign all sorts of documents for the matter to be finalised.  Groan.  Where we are right now after several more hurdles being jumped over is that the Title is now with the people who decide all things Stamp Duty.  This can take weeks.  More groaning.  This also means my buffer could be gone up in Stamp Duty smoke and changes everything.  Hence, my worries.  Why cannot life be 'just simple' for me just once.  Not much to ask for me thinks.

I have to tell you something funny here.  I said thank you to the assistant lawyer for reminding me about the bank evelope.  To my surprise she said, 'you told Paul in March 2008 to put a note in the file to remind you when it was required in the future that the Title was in the said envelope and bank'!  Well, what a clever dickie was I to send myself a reminder from way back when, which turned out to be almost 4 years on.

I did get to sit with Paul and chat about Mum's wishes and how long it has taken in coming around.  We met in May 2007.  So long ago now.  He remembered her so fondly and stated what a clever person she was.  That she knew what her one daughter would do and countered it before it happened.  Paul also could not get over the depths my one sister went to to get me to bow to her demands.  Must say I had a good cry that day with all the memories flooding back from that time.  It was a healthy crying as I remembered what Mum set out to do while dying from cancer.  Whether this sister will take on Mum's message or not will be up to her.  I just know that Mum would be settled now knowing what she wanted and her wishes got done to the letter.

Now the wait creeps on.  I knew deep down setting out to finalise the Will would be frought with heartache and delays, but this really has sent me into a tailspin. 

See how easy it is to slide back.

In the meantime, I have been sending my Resume out left, right and centre.  Have had a few nibbles.  Hope I get something soon as that would settle me down somewhat.  Also, went to Centrelink (as I used to call them Centrestink) to advise of my altered circumstances and I will be going through more transition and will be in a state of flux for a few months yet to come there also.  I feel like all my tenpin bowling balls are all up in the air hovering over me and not knowing when they shall drop.  One by one or all at once.  Not a great feeling.  No wonder I got sick and avoidance set in.

With my positivity deminishing and being distracted with finalising the Will and getting the Home Loan sorted I felt like I was pushing uphill bigtime and getting very frustrated that time was dragging in this case.  I am so close to this chapter ending that it is agony getting there.

Due to this delay, I am in this limbo land until the last part of the Will is done and dusted.  Until such time, the Home Loan has also come to a complete halt.  I just hope the outcome will be doable.  I only accounted for so much and wish I had added an extra ten thousand now for the possibility that I may now have to pay the dreaded Stamp Duty.  The Title is now in the hands of the government department that decides such things and this could take weeks, which in turn makes this all very horrifying for me.  More delays.  Being that it is a gift and not bought they have to look into the legality and 'meaning' and intent of the Will to then ascertain who if any pays Stamp Duty and on what.  Very murky if you ask me and 'interpretation' can be skewed.  Afterall, they are into making money for the government.  I just hope I have calculated enough to cover any such contingency.

I have retreated into some of the same old patterns in order to avoid the elephant in the room due to my personal worries.  I mention this as this is what happens when life throws you these curve balls and if you are not yet strong enough to handle such events it can and will knock you down.  I was going so well there for a while that just like in sitcoms when it is all too wonderful something has to happens to knock you over and give you that massive wake up call.

One good thing to report.  The Red Light Camera fine that I got in error has been sorted and now going to the rightful party.

Here is the withdrawal...

A small victory in this case!

In the meantime, I have had to fork out a ton of money on my son's student transport card and on top of this I also promised him he would have a 16th birthday party as he really hasn't had one since before Mum died.  We have settled on 6 boys in all going to Luna Park with All Day ride access plus starting at Macca's for lunch and then they can ride to their hearts content till 8pm.  Going on the rides at night is the best.  Now with all these delays and potential extra costs I am now freaked out about money or lack thereof.  I know it will all pan out.  I just wish I had a crystall ball to know I will end up having enough. 

But the party will go ahead as we need some fun time as well.  So if we go down.  We go down as a family.  Together.

I will make an attempt at getting the lounge room at least in order by Easter end.  Also sit down and work out a Working Bee weekend on the garden as it really has been taken over by 'The Triffids'.

Here are some photos to show you how much the plants have truly taken over.

This is the side to the back yard, which needs to be totally cleared.

Next is a side view of the back yard.  The Magnolia bush... now tree has taken over the yard and needs a sharp trim back big time.

The is of the back door.  You can see steps there somewhere!

This is the other side of the house that I have hacked at several times and yet here it is - total takeover time!  You will see the water tanks on the side - just.

Now this is a high (POV) point of view above the water tanks.  The bush at the end is around 3 metres high and is now at gutter height!  On top of this there is a weed growing from one of the water tanks that you can see in the foreground.  Talk about a Triffids takeover!

All this had been cut back and it has gone buresque!  Just add water and look what happens!!!  It has gotten to the point that it is totally out of hand and I need help.  A lot will have to be trimmed right back and some bushes will need to be removed as they just get out of control too quickly. 

Mum always said I wouldn't cope with the garden.  Oh, how she knew.  We stood together in the backyard one day not long before she went into palliative and we both were shaking our heads and what was to be.  Mum was amused by all of this and she and Dad would be having a right laugh right now.  But, I wouldn't trade this part of the experience for anything.  Fond memories of my parents that I treasure.

As for the lounge room that has stuff dumped on one of the couches and so on.  There will be one unhappy camper and that will be Miss Kafups as I call her, otherwise known as Missy. 

Here she is in her 'new' and current favourite pozzie...

Not for long.  She will not be amused.

Last, but not least, I will have to work on my "stinkin' thinkin'" and turn that around as well.  When I am down is when I am  the least productive with getting rid of the 'STUFF' and finding time to do it.  It's not like I don't have the time is it now.  But such is the way when people are involved.  Anything can happen.  With those last three words I have to turn it from a negative to a positive.  No woe is me any more.  I have to pull myself up and just start.  As hard as that is to do, I shall find the strength from somewhere and do just that.  Make it happen.

In a way, by writing this 'blog', it will help me from going deep into my doldrums and get me back to being up again.  I have to remember my own advise and to be kind to myself as I don't want to make this situation worse than it already is.

I am desperately trying to be patient and cool as a cucumber!  So very hard to do.  Hope to report next time all is signed, sealed and delivered and that the next chapter of my life has begun.

Now off my butsky from the computer and on into the fray called 'the loungeroom'! 

Yes, folks!  I'm going in. 

Wish me luck and see you on the other side.

Cheers to you all
Anita

ps - Happy Easter to those to whom it matters.  As for all of you don't let life's trials and tribulations get in the way of your progress and if it does, then just enjoy your family and friends. 
Take care over the holidays folks.

Embracing change is hard to do!

Hi Guys,

Well, here I am thinking I have the job that I love that would last for a long time. At least that is what I thought.

Life has a way of throwing twists and turns at you and the last few weeks in my case has been no exception.

One day you are employed and the next you are not! 

But let's look at the silver lining.  I have got off my bum and now more active and less apathetic about what life can entail.  This will give me that much needed valuable time to really sort through the stuff.  I actually feel motivated in doing such.

I will go back a little in time so you can better see my picture. 

At the conference that I attended in January, it was apparent then and there, that there was a lot more politics to this company than I first realised.  I also discovered that the company was very top heavy.  Does anyone remember the song Dean Martin sang 'Too Many Chiefs And Not Enough Indians'?  Well, it certainly was the case here.

The man who hired me was fantastic and I so enjoyed working for him.  Communication flowed and the support was freely given.  You knew what was happening and was well informed.  However, just before Christmas he mysteriously dissappeared.  I suspect he was shafted out of his postion.  His sales style was more along the lines of mine which is to develop relationships for longevity.  It became obvious at the Conference that the company was now heading more along the lines of aggressive sales techniques and expectations.  And in this current economic climate not a good move if you ask me.

Being that he hired me I knew I would have a target on my back.  It didn't take long for this to happen and certain big wigs started making comments and finally within weeks one of them, the General Manager no less, from Sydney, came to see me.  I sat there at this meeting, watching my immediate boss here in Melbourne tell blatant lies to save her own bacon and I did pipe up at this stage stating that the figures they were going by where inaccurate, at which point the GM said that doesn't matter. 

I was floored at this attitude.  Flabberghasted even. 

I learnt at this meeting more people where being employed (not sales) but more bosses that will have to be paid for from somewhere.  They were not interested in facts and twisted the inaccuracies to suit their purpose.  I knew that no matter what I said at this point it would just sound like an excuse, as they were not taking anything of fact on board.  I played along to get more precious time in order for the recent home loan application to go through.  This home loan meant that even out of work I would be able to get by.  Tough, but get by regardless. 

I wont go into the ins and outs of the situation, other than to say, they felt they were in the drivers seat and had total control over me.

I worked out that I had at least 7 bosses above me.  I mean, how many does it take to make a decision!
 
I was given 2 weeks to 'improve' and another meeting was called 9 days on (looks like they cannot add) via telephone conference.  30 minutes prior to that conference call I tendered my resignation along with my reasons why.  I was factual and professional and to the point.  They were floored.  I had gesumped them. 

I ended up speaking to the GM the next day (last Friday) who had convinced herself that the figures did not matter.  Now that is just not logical in my book.  I relayed that I could not work for a company that does not work on accurate figures when making vital decisions and that where this company was now heading was somewhere that I had no interest in taking that journey with them.  I do not see aggressive sales as desireable nor ideal and would rather have my integrity stay intact than go there.

This GM stated she woud take on board my comments, but I could tell they would rather convince themselves they were right at all costs than fix the cancer within their ranks.  Shame really.

She told me they had a discussion as what to do and had all decided to release me and that today was my final day.  This was at noon.

At 3.40pm the very same day my Mortgage Broker called and advised me that my loan application had been unconditionally approved.  Talk about a close shave.  The eleventh hour.  Or who could have scripted this better?  Real life or a sitcom writer!  My life is never dull of this I am sure.

Even though I resigned I know I will miss my job.  I love what I do.  But I have to find the right company.  As they say in the fairy tales, I will have to kiss a few toads to find my frog prince.  Onward in my quest for the perfect fit.

I am sure my last place of employment will keep growing, but they have the serious potential to implode.  I hope they look at the things that have been said and address the cancer from within their own ranks.  But I highly doubt that.

All I know is I saved myself from a very toxic situation.

As shell shocked as I was, the next day, Saturday, my sons Dad arrived with a queen size (second hand) bed for him.  My son and I removed everything out of his room.  After removing all the dead bodies, lolly and chip packets and lord knows what and vacuuming, it was looking half decent once more.  We found all sorts of things.  That DVD that was missing.  All the missing socks and so on.  Nothing like a good old purge.

I told my boy to only put back what he wanted.  After many bags of rubbish and a few bags for the charity bins and several hours later his room was trasformed.  He woke up in a boys room and will go to sleep in a teenagers room.  There are still areas to address, but it was a huge improvement and one that I could see my son will totally appreciated.  A teenagers retreat.

This now meant I now have 2 mattresses under the carport and more stuff on the now growing junk pile.

I am beginning to look more and more like Steptoe & Son by the day.

Here are my growing collection of mattresses that you cannot get rid of for love or money...

And not far the ever growing junk pile...

Not a good look, but will be removed as soon as I can organise someone with a trailer to take to the tip.

On the Monday I had asked a friend to come and help fix my now very sad and sorry and completely dilapidated letter box.

Here is what the old letter box ended up looking like...

Very sad looking indeed.  The door had gone and the roof collapsed and there was tape holding the pole together.  I think I can safely say this letter box had done it's job and now had to go.  My postie will be pleased if no one else!

I had found and bought a suitable letter box via a charity shop at a pinch of the price without the pole and all I had to buy was a pole on which to sit said letter box on.  I did pick up a letter box sometime back on a pole with the concrete still attached and had visions of knocking the concrete off, but my friend said after giving it a few blows that it just wasn't worth it.  Looks way better now and all I have to get is a padlock for it and we are done.

Here is the new one being put into situ by my friend John...

Here is how it looks from my porch area... Isn't she a beaut!

My postie will be one happy chappy!

Like I have said before, you look worse while you go through this process, but you are on your way to having that vision burst through.

Will have to contact the council to find out if they will do a one off collection for me.  But wont hold my breath.  Otherwise, it will have to all wait till September for the next collection if I cannot find someone to help take it to the tip.

Today I intend to start work on getting my lounge room sorted again with all that I dumped in there from what I had tossed out of my room when I got the new mattress and regain the use of my sanctuary.  It all takes time and effort and above all else motivation.  Sadly time I didn't have, but happily do now.  Effort is not an issue as much.  But motivation!  Well, that is an entirely different matter all together.  It is easy to get side tracked.  Something I will have to keep a watch out for.

Each day I intend to do something and this way in no time at all I should be that closer to my vision.

Being that it is Autumn I want to organise after Easter a weekend for a few of my friends to come and help me cut back the overgrowth that really has got out of hand, weed, plant the drought hardy clumping plants that I have been slowly buying up with a BBQ at the end of it.  Along with the help of my children we should be done in no time at all.  That way I will be able to get the tree loppers in and it wont cost as much.  Well, am hoping that that will be the case.

Lastly, remembering my now motto, 'onward and outward a little at a time everyday'!

Chiz
Anita - back to looking for work while I work!

Today is 29 February 2012!

Hi Guys,

Really don't have much to report other than wanting to post today due to the 'special' date! 

29 February 2012

Wont be able to do this again for another 4 whole years till 2016!  Then, if we really want a great date what about 2020!!!  OK getting ahead of myself here... maybe I should just concentrate on getting rid of the stuff before 2020. Or better still 2016!  I hope to be 'done' well before then.

I haven't had much time to do much of anything really as my boss who hired me left or who knows what from the company I work for prior to Christmas under a cloud of secrecy.  Since the conference in mid January it appear we have gone from a 'team' to 'individual' performances and guess who is in the firing line.  Yep, little ol' me.  Being that the Howard government made it possible for employers to 'get rid of' or 'cull' at will prior to 12 months employment for staff under 100 without cause and 6 months for over means I do not have a leg to stand on and have been head down, bum up and trying to stay under the radar.  Looks like I may have failed as one of the big wigs is coming down 'to chat'!  Now that certainly doesn't make my heart beat any better.

So my plans may be gesumped before I can complete what I have set out to do and that is combine all debts into one low home mortgage and finalise my Mum's Will prior to the set date of 28 October 2013.  If I don't, then I will have to sell this place regardless and will have no choice in the matter.  I was hoping, just once, for things to go my way, but the economy, local and global has other ideas in store for me by the look of things.

So, my Mum's wishes for me to have some 'stress free time' hasn't really happened.

Have gone through papers and all the stuff that I dumped in the lounge room when the mattress came and have gotten half way through, but that has come to a complete halt now until I know where I stand with this job bizo and trying to get a low mortgage before the possibility of loosing it happens.  After which time I can then concentrate on looking for another job or convince the current bosses to cut my days till things improve instead of letting me go.

The garden is looking like crap and have started to get cards in the now falling apart letterbox for tree loppers etc and have no spare cash to do such until I know what will be the ultimate outcome with my 'very' precarious job.

When I feel stressed like this, I tend not to be able to cull as well as I normally do.  You go into this mindset of what if I need this one day and if I throw it out or give it away and then I need one again, what then!  Better not, so as 'NOT' to waste what precious little money I have.  You start to save things for that 'rainy' day.  That time when you 'may' need it. 

This uncertainty certainly 'DOES NOT' help me at 'ALL'.

Wish me luck guys in getting the 'low' mortgage through first before getting the heave-ho.  Or just keeping my job and getting the mortgage.

Life has to be simpler than all this palava.

Might just go curl up and watch sad movies and cry. 

No, must try to get through this hurdle as well.  Let's see where the wind takes me this time.  Hope it ends up better than what I am currently anticipating.

Now if anyone needs anything I am selling heaps of things.  All you have to do is request.  You can find me at anita.sulcs@gmail.com or Facebook.  Well, worth a try, isn't it?  Have nothing to lose.  Oh, yes, the job.  Let's try and keep the job at all costs. 

Maybe, I can say this to my boss on Monday....

Or...

Not sure if that one would work?  Do you?

Or I could just do some....

In the end I will just have to remember this and go with the flow...



And with that 'motto' in hand, I will bid this 29th day of February 2012 'farewell'.

My plans are to get on top of this sillyness so I can get on top of my 'blinkin' stuff'!

Cheers for now and will just have to 'keep on smiling'.

Anita

ps... hopefully still gainfully employed the next time I 'Blog'!

Time to do a stocktake and reflect ONE year on!

Hi Guys,

Wow!  Tomorrow it will be one year, to the day, that I put finger pads to keyboard pad and wrote my first ever blog about an issue that had enveloped me like no other!  TOO MUCH STUFF!

This was one of the very first things I got rid of, in 2008, which was my son's Cubby House, as it wouldn't fit in my parents backyard and was actually sitting on the vegie patch when I sold it 4 years ago to a family with toddlers.  Looking at the photos I took for the then 'Trading Post' seems so long ago now.

It also seems so long ago that I started this blog!  I started out with humour, not thinking anyone would look at it, let alone read it.  So far the most favoured post is still the one called 'Letting You Know' last June, which is when I first started with uploading photos to shake it up a bit.  And these photos were of my daughters feet modelling the diamonte stilleto shoes that I finally did sell on eBay.  Now, I so suspect it is more like people with a 'foot fettish' that took a shinee to my daughters feet and that was the attraction rather than the content... hmmmm.... but none the less it has been hugely popular.

Here are the said 'stilleto's' without feet/legs modelling them...

  

Here are my foot that could have modelled them....

Now here is my daughter's leg/feet that ended up doing the modelling...

Which one wins!  Absolutely, mine, of course, but don't tell my daughter will ya'!

The demographic or 'audience' is varied as well.  I couldn't get over someone from Alaska, India, Afghanistan, Brazil, Russia, Bosnia & Herzegovnia, Uzbekistan, Canada, England (UK), Thailand and even from my parents homeland Latvija to name a few.  The vast amount are from America (USA) and Australia (AUS).  This just goes to show that we are not all that different from each other with our problems and ergo hopes and dreams.  'Stuff' effects us all, no matter where we live or circumstance.

Due to the fact that I have posted this on my FB page, I have had little feedback from those of you who view this blog.  Apparently some have had diffuculty with this.  I have written 28 posts so far with only 2 comments in that time.  What's with that?  Boy, are we a shy lot.

I would like to say just because you read this does not necessarily mean you also have this issue, but rather may be reading it to help another fellow friend or family member nearby.  I decided to 'let it all hang out' so to speak and destigmatise this type of event in ones life.  Like all problems, it can be sorted out in the end.  And I no longer wanted to feel ashamed of what was thrust upon me.  Be it that most of which I inherited and some of my own doing as well.  So please, feel free to chime in once in awhile.  We can help each other.  A problem shared is a problem halved.  Also, by sharing you start the process.  Plus, I would like to hear from you with some feedback or some of your own suggestions or stories.  Let's see if we can now take this to the next level, so don't be shy.  Pipe up!  There are usually many comments on my Facebook page when I post these ... so why not post there?   Just look for Anita Sulcs and you should find me.

Entirely up to you, but I would enjoy the communication with you.

Like all things this is a process that takes time.  Life factors get in the way and you have to work as well along with the pressures of daily life doesn't help either.  But given time, and allow yourself that time, it does get done in the end.  It doesn't have to be like the 'TV reality shows' and be done in a day or weekend.  As, Lord knows we don't have 50 helpers and unlimited funds as they do, but rather more realistically and done in stages over a peiod of time and this is where you have to be generous, give yourself a deadline to reach or otherwise it will never have an ending.  Decide what you want and visualise it and then with your 1, 2 or even 5 year plan, set about achieving that.

This is me one day for work on Conference in Sydney enjoying their Harbour near Manly.  Tough life eh!

.

Life's trauma's do effect us all and can cause this and many other issues to get exponentially worse rapidly.  If that is the case, forget the stuff and heal thyself first.  Without you being whole, you will just crumble underneath the weight of the 'decluttering' and become even more overcome, which will defeat the whole excercise.  Prioritise what is important.  List it if necessary and tick each point when you achieve it.  When you sit down one day in a years time ... do have those photos to remember where you were and you will be amazed at how far you have come, but had forgotten.  A photo of a room taken from the same vantage point every several months does serve as a 'visual' reminder to yourself.  We easily forget and it does help as a motivator.  Even if it meant just one shelf got cleared, it is now one shelf closer to your end visualised picture in your mind of where you see this room to be.


This was the loungeroom some 3 years ago.  This is almost empty as it was storing many boxes and furniture.  We couldn't get through and had to use the corridor only to get to the kitchen.  So imagine where to glass part of the cabinet is and that was where top of the boxes were and the whole lounge was full to the brim.  And I have to say that there was the 2 huge piles under the carport along with the boxes and crates in Richmond on a mezzanine floor and all my furniture and more boxes in my neighbours garage.  Now the lounge is usable, the carport has decreased by two thirds and there is nothing in Richmond any longer and only 6 pieces of furniture in my neighbours garage.  I have come along way when I look back and reflect.

 

Here is the lounge room empty looking back diagonally towards where the other photo was taken...

Now a usable space!

If nothing else, don't beat yourself up with negativity.  Be kind to yourself, by starting you are doing, by doing you are getting things done, and when you are done it will feel fantastic.

I, myself am two thirds of the way there.  When I look back at these photos now to where I was, I am still amazed at how muc I have achieved.  But I cannot stop, even though the Christmas break and work has interferred yet once more. 

There is much less of this now.  Lower with more room.  The mower has been given away and I need to set a future weekend aside and will seriously knock what is left off, hopefully in early March.  Well, that is the plan.  But I can actually see the road now from the porch which obviously early last year you could clearly not!

I did end up doing a clean out of the carport area of all the 'rubbish' and now have to organise for that to go to the tip, being that my local council only does hard rubbish collection just a miserly once a year.  I am getting a new mattress next week.  One that will be better support for my back so making my day will be much easier and pain free.  The old mattress has to be thrown out to the tip so when that it removed outside it will join the other rubbish and will all go for good.

I have only recently decided to stay where I am and 'pay out the 2 recipients from my Mum's Will more than 2 years ealier than I have to'.  The monkey will be off my back and I wont feel like I am in 'no man's land'.  Then the place will be completely mine and I can truly get my projects sorted and underway one by one, which will motivate me to 'GET RID OF THE STUFF' even more.

Here are my parents, Zaiga and Eddie, Dusi Saldi.

And the home I can soon call my own!

Now that I have decided to stay I can now fine tune my future plans more efficiently and effectively.

Once I got passed just chatting on this blog and discovered how to post photos, I really got to see more rather than just 'talk' about the issue.  I do hope that you have found the photos of some value and interest.

This is me celebrating my birthday with family and friends, which really is in the worst time of the year... early January.  No one is ever around to celebrate due to being away!  This year I got lucky and overjoyed by the turnout.  We need these 'happy' breaks to keep going.  Otherwise, what is life for!!!  Just to slog it out.  Hell no... give me some hearty gatherings of gorgeous friends anytime.  This is my reward.

This blog has given me much more than I could've ever realise and has proven to be a useful tool in better dealing with the process of 'decluttering'.  I have found it less stressful and far more bearable.  I can totally recommend others doing the same.

So there you have it, this blog one whole year on!  Unbelievable really.  From where I was, to where I am now.  Even though I detest and resent being in this situation, I have learnt so much more personally by going and getting through it.  One that I do not now regret. 

Here's me with my daughter, Aija.

And now with my son Zigis.

Now don't be shy.  Please do say 'boo' even.  I would dearly love to hear your thoughts.

I have found sayings off the internet, mainly facebook that I find enlightening.  You may find these help... or not.

But one thing is for sure and that is....

At times you will feel like this... many times... like this...

But try to think along other lines to help you get out of your rut...

Which is what I am currently doing and sharing what I no longer need, or is way too much for one person...

So I can go and finally enjoy those sunsets and one day even find myself under an Aurora Borealis!

Sounds better than 'STUFF' to me.

Well, here's to the next year, which I have given myself to clear the hallway, the carport, the shed, the attic and what is over in the neighbours garage.  Along with getting that mortgage so I can truly be a home owner once more. 

Totally achievable now that I have looked back at where I have come from and now to where I am heading.

Cheers all
Anita

ps - don't forget to comment or go over to my facebook page and comment there if you are having difficulty doing so here.

Whatever you do or don't do, it is still your choice!

Hi Guys,

Have had the holiday and now back at work.

During the holidays the weather had a mind of it's own once agin this year. Melbourne is known for being unique in the way of one can experience all four seasons rolled into one day! No joke, it happens. Summer is notoriously fickle and as I have my birthday early January have had 40 plus (centigrade for those overseas) heat waves with northerly winds to gorgeous day to torrential rain and freezing cold to hailnstorms. Yep, I have had the lot.

This year was no different other than we went from the 40c degree with the hot humidity which is like walking through treacle and then it poured with rain with a dash of hail larger than golf balls. So much damage. Yet there is what is left of my stuff under the carport.

Even weather cannot move this mountain.

But like I said it is a choice. I chose not to have heat stress. I chose not to be a drowned rat. I chose to spend time with my family. Between all the festive celebrations the days that I could have decluttered Were virtual hell-holes. Just not worth going there. So you see even the best laid plans can go south very fast. And this start to the year was no exception.

I have to go away for a week for a work conference which again sets me back even further. On my return I will hit the groud running with head down and bum up concentrating on getting my work life to have the best start.

Ijust want to ferris of the rubbish for starters and the old TVs that seem to line many a pavement lately along with the Christmas tree that I held onto the last 5 years to only find out it no longer works. Now that was hilarious if you ask me. Here I am, carefully looking after my favorite optic Christmas tree and looking forward to the light show to first find out no adptor as it is packed away somewhere else as I mentioned in my last post to then buy one and then with such built up anticipation for "nothing". Yep, had to laugh and one big huge expensive lesson learnt about how too much stuff does end up costing you money firsthand. Big time.

Then on my return it will be time to get my son ready for school. After which I plan to attack the rubbish under the carport.

Remember, there is nothing wrong with changing your plans. After all, life is far too short to get your knickers in a knot over a perceived set back. It is your choice as to how you deal with your stuff. Stuff will cone and go, but your now lasts only once and I choose to make it as.good as possible for me.

So choose to live and choose the way in which you wish to live it. And at the end of the day with what you live with.

When I was ver ill I chose to rest. When I had work or family commitments I chose to participate in those commitments. When I was invited out I chose to join in. This does take you away from the job at hand, but let's face it, the stuff isn't going anywhere. Of this we are sure of.

A friend recently had his house burn down and was left with nothing. I was telling him of my plans and asked if there was anything in particular he needed so I could give those items to him. He quipped that having all your stuff burn down certainly eliminates all this palava I was going through. I know that I would prefer my problems and issues to loosing all the visual memories as he so tragically had. Nothing can replace certain items, but nothing can rplece a life ever.

So I choose to live and one that I can look back on with fond memories and with the good. 'stuff'.
By February I hope to get back and be able to faithfully say that I have finally achieved something about my 'stuff' and less of it.

Will check in then. In the meantime, please excuse the spelling errors as the iPad I am using is not allowing me the ability to do so.

Cheers all, hope 2012 will be the best yet
Anita

Impossible New Year Resolutions!

Hi Guys,

Happy New Year guys. 

Almost a year since I started this blogg, but not when I started unhoarding!  That has taken much much longer than anticipated.

This is where you quite possibly find yourself saying each new year with adnauseum that this year will be the year you 'get rid of it all'! 

Well, be careful what you wish for, as you just might be setting yourself up for one big fall.  Try for something unusual like make your resolution to have attainable expectations of what you set out to achieve.  That and be kind to yourself.

Being that Christmas has just  whizzed by yet again, it was at one of my get togethers over this period is with an old neighbour of mine who witnessed the major part of my trauma 5 years ealier.  She also lent a helping hand at carting some of the last remains of my 'stuff' to under my then still parents home carport. 

It was at one of these many trips that she looked at the sheer load, equally overcome, with what I had to deal with and stated to me ... 'you wont get it done before you have to either pay out the 'Will' recipients (which in this case was 6 years from the death of Mum who had died recently) or have to sell as you wont want to go through moving this lot along with what I had inherited ever again!

She was dead right.

The prospect of this thought sent a shudder through my entire body.  It was there and then under the said offending carport that I bet my friend Maureen. I could and would get the bulk of it done within 5 years.  She did chuckle I must admit, but accepted the bet.  Next year is my last year of that very bet.  Specifically, I need to have cleared the carport area, the neighbours garage and what was on a pellet on a mezzanine floor at a friends factory.

The items at the factory have been dealt with and finalised late last year.  My neighbours garage now only has 6 pieces of furniture left and I have plans for what remains and all the boxes have been dealt with and trust me there were many such boxes.  The carport area has been in these last 4 odd years been reduced to a quarter of what was once there.  One would think I am on track to win this bet.

Think again!

During most of those years, I was not working and I am now working 4 days a week.  The odds are stacked against me.  However, I am still going to give a good crack at it, as this very bet does help me keep forging ahead.  One of my many ways to keep up my momentum... for a better word 'motivation'.

Even though the end date was at the time of the bet felt so far in advance, it certainly feels like it is looming like the old proverbial and breathing down my neck as I write this.

Now the bet entails, if I have not fully dealt with the exterior carport and that does not mean piling it all in the house if  there are still stacks there... I mean dealt with in some way... ie... disposed of, given away or kept in a spot then, Maureen wins, and I have to take her out for a swish dinner at my expense.

Ah, but the sweet victory for me to have the exterior carport all done and dusted means, Maureen takes me out at her expense!  Now how wonderful would that be!

Either way, I still really win!  This very bet will have pushed me to do what I have had to do to be rid of at least the bulk of this very heavy load that was thrust upon me.

I see Maureen every Christmas day morning at which point, she happily, for the first time, reminded me of this bet.  Funny, how now, she is only just checking up on me.  However, she feels she will be the one being taken out for dinner.  She hasn't seen how far I have come and quite frankly I will have to get her over for her reaction as that will tell you all just how much I have achieved.  I do believe she will be quite dumbfounded or just simpy stunned.  Also, a nice reminder for me.

If you do have a horrendous load like I did and it all seems too much, do consider a bet like this with ample time, but not too ample as to never to ever intend to 'do it'.  Then disect into lots like I have and then tackl it slowly like the tortoise in the nursery ryhme.  Just steady as she goes.

So, please, no big outlandish resolutions with unrealistic timelines and expectations.  Be kind to yourself as this process will test you at times and hurt like hell. 

There will be tears.  So many tears that it will surprise you that you have so much pouring out of you.  Some of these will be through sheer joy that you got one little shelf done.  Some with the pain that will hurt like there is no tomorrow yet be healing in the end.  Allow those tears to flow as it also means that pain flows away with it.

Also, include treating yourself once in awhile with in your resolution to 'purge' to 'let go' to 'rid one self of' all the 'stuff'.  At the end of the day it is you who will have to live with the final content.  I have a visual of what I want in the end.  No one else can see it.  But I can.  That is why I am dogmatic on certain items to stay that will fit into this 'perfect picture' of mine.

I will try and draw this picture next time.  Maybe just describe it... or begin to describe it.  That is for next time. 

It is holidays for now and will devote only one day to 'the stuff'. It is also important to take advantage of recouping ones energies both physical and mental to tackle the oncoming year.

On another note, I was quite proud that I did not get overloaded with big presents this year.  My lot are beginning to get the picture as to how not add to my 'issues'.

Talking about Christmas, I finally spent it at home.  First time since Mum died.  The home was finally acceptable enough to be able to achieve this.  I celebrate on Christmas Eve.

Here's me with some of my 'first time' prepared fare.  I actually remembered how to make Mum's delicious Latvian potatoe salad as I hadn't made it in years.  Amazing what seeps in eh!

Here is Aija at the end cooking the final touches - the schnitzels!!!  Yumo.  All I forgot were the cotlets and pirags.  However, we did have the smoked zuti!  Now that was delish.

This year I broke rank and went to another Ministers service.  She recently had a brain tumour taken out and is fighting the good fight.  She was a good friend of my Mum's and was there with me not long after Mum died and so wanted to see and be with her to show her my love and support.  I also went through Latvian Saturday School with her daughter.  After the service with much Latvian Christmas carols being sung I got the chance to see her and cuddle her and her whispered words in my ear were 'I am in God's hands and it will be his decision when I must go'.  It was all I could do to cry as she is such a sweetheart and her profound belief is what carry's her, just as it did my Mum.  For Mara's many hours spent with my Mum in Palliative and before I will forever be grateful as they comforted her and gave here peace.

Anyway, after the service we went home to get the rest of lunch together, which normally would be dinner and then open presents and then carols and if I get lucky reciting poems.  Any way ... the Christmas tree I have held onto all this time since the start of the move nearly 5 years ago is a fibre optic one and the adaptor I found out was missing ... like I needed that like a hole in the head.  This is where too much stuff really costs you.  I had to go and buy one to then only find out the tree mechanism was no longer working!!! 

Yep, call me a tad annoyed, but I looked at the silver side after my initial annoyance.  Yet another thing can get tossed. No point keeping it like my parents would have done.  I will either do a real one next Christmas or buy another fibre optic through the year. 

Such is the way with too much 'stuff'.  It does end up costing you unnecessarily!

I made it look good by twining 20 metres of LED twinkle lights.  Really spectacular if I say so myself.

My three wise monkey's!

To say I had a good Christms would be an understatement.  It was the bomb.  All that hard work with my daughter Aija and assistance by my son Zigis really meant we could have that traditional family Christmas like we used to and keep that tradion going once more.  I did cry, but it was a good cry, a happy joyful cry.  I am truly blessed.

Now it is my birthday coming up shortly and I will also be going away for a conference.  I plan to do some more after the major heat of summer is over.  It will be during this time I will try to fix things around the house and garden and if I get really motivated deal with more boxes of paper work.  I do have to deal with the taxman one day so may concentrate on finding those boxes of paper work to finalise yet another 'to do' on my list and kill two birds with one stone.  If not then a day with a friend and deal with 'what's behind the cupboard doors!!!'.  OooAhhh, now that would be really getting ahead of myself.

Anyhoo, there is still much to be done.  I do wish you all well for 2012 and hope that it brings with it only wonderful things and success in your life and projects.  

Here's to all of us for the best year yet!!!  Thinking positive now...

Oh happy days!  With my family!



Anita xxx

ps - if all else fails right now, breathe in breathe out and just take one day at a time or write to me to vent as I am a good listener and love to help others.