There is movement at the house!!!

Hi Guys,

Well, I don't believe it!  After 3 months in my new job I have actually started on the inside of the house.  Will wonders never cease!

This current wave of activity is somewhat due to my daughter's insistance.  Her boyfriend wants to meet me and she wants the place presentable.  I just say to her, explain my situation.  That and had she included some time into her busy social calendar earlier then this would be a mute point.

She set a day aside last weekend taking into consideration my back and that I had to go to work so chose a Saturday so I could recover on the Sunday prior to work..  We started methodically in the lounge of what was still there plus the corridor.  Alot of it was papers that had to be looked at.  I threw out alot of things including getting rid of anything remotely broken and items for the Sallies. 

We had to move furniture at one stage to make the room work better.  My son helped out with cups of tea and lifting heavy boxes.  My daughter before starting this had visions of tackling the lounge as well as the kitchen!  She realised later that day that that was not going to happen.  It is finally starting to sink in the magnitude of the job and the energy and time required in which to do it.

Sadly, I had to let go of my Grandmum's wooden rocking chair.  I just don't have the room at the moment.

The lounge area we started on is looking presentable.  However, we didn't even touch on what was behind the buffets cupboard doors.  That is for another day.  We really only skimmed the surface.  And that took us ALL day.

Those in this situation generally need assistance to get this job done.  As it is, there are now piles of rubbish bags outside under the carport to fit into bins, which will take several weeks.  I only have a small council bin.  Along with the bags filling the porch to go to the Sallies.  And last, the broken items that need to be sent to the tip or into a skip.  My daughter will take the bags and bags to the Sallies and I will work on the rubbish.  As for the broken items we will have to figure that out later on as my council only provide one hard rubbish removal a year.  Very inconsiderate and inconvenient.

When I moved the last of Mum's boxes from my neighbours garage back under my carport, I tossed heaps of magazines along with fabric, wool, kitchenware, furniture, clothing (baby, childrens and adult), shoes and anything else you can think of.  On reflection, it does get somewhat easier. I cannot believe I only left myself with 6 pieces of my furniture in the end from the garage, which includes a spare fridge.  Which looks like my daughter will take when she moves out later next year! Bright side is, after I get through with what is still left, which by the way is still abundant, I can start afresh. Woohoo.  But I cannot celebrate just yet.  Ahhh, that distant tantilising light.

I just want all this to be over now!

The day spent with my daughter was fantastic.  We worked like a well oiled machine with not one disagreement throughtout.  It is a relief to finally have her on board with a positive outlook rather than the negative one in the past.  Such a difference to the outcome.  This meant no matter how tired we were we were relaxed to handle the task at hand.

In the past I felt like I had to fight to be understood as to my methods and sequence of going about my humoungous downsizing.  This growth in her is remarkable and feel so proud of her for taking that leap of faith in trusting my process.

I am trully blessed with 2 of the most wonderful children.  They now embody what I have been trying to impart to them all these years.  But a mother's job is never done and neither has my decluttering for that matter.

A person in amongst my friend circle has suffered a blow in that his entire house was fire bombed and lost the lot.  I will be giving him one of the Christmas trees that is still its box unopened that Mum had along with some key items to get his family back up.  These items can be replaced for those they would like, but in the meantime it means my Mum's things will serve a purpose and that idea I really like.

A friend has offered to come over in the holidays to speed up this process and we will work on downsizing what's in the cupboards in the lounge and if possible including the kitchen area.  Then when I go through what's left of my boxes - if it doesn't fit - I will have to either give it away or change it for an item in that cupboard.  I just don't want to end up with only my Mum's stuff.  I still want my items as well.  But you don't need 5 dinner sets.  I have already given away 2 sets and I think I am down to 3 so one more to go.  This is where the hard part comes.  Deciding which to keep!!!

It truly is a dilemma of all magnitude.  I may have to resort to 'eany meany mo' method!  No joke.

Then there are the Latvian books.  There are soooo many.  I will keep the historical ones for sure.  The dictionaries, bibles, history and geography books, but will have to seriously look at the novels.  I just cannot keep them all.  Another huge job in itself. 

The there are all the photo albums and negatives as Mum was a prolific photo taker.  I will need to ensure who is who in the photos and take stock as in amongst her albums are Grandmum's albums as well.  You can see where I am heading here.  Yet another time consuming job.

Then there are all the letters and paperwork she kept.  I have the original tredle sewing machine she bought in the early 50s in Western Australia.  It is still in working order, with the original sewing tin and kit that came with the machine along with the receipt!  This totally blew me away.  Such history.  That will stay where it is and a hex to anyone who removes it. There are some things you just don't mess with.

Oh, by the way, my gorgeous Peter Jago hat did not sell... and yes, true to my word, off to the Sallies it went.  Now, that one wasn't easy.  I love my hats even if they no longer love me.

Christmas is fast approaching and I am thinking ... would it be in poor taste to gift some of this good stuff!  More than likely yes... but hell what am I to do?  In the area of cashflow, that side is ever so slowly improving, but again, I am in no way out of the woods as yet.

I have for many years now helped out at one of the Sallies branches for their Christmas drive in packaging and handing out bags of gifts for families so the children will have something under the tree, along with food vouchers and a Christmas fare basket as well.  I love doing this as it brings home how hard life is for others other than yourself.  It helps shift one's focus on the greater community rather than be self involved.  It also means you gain a greater appreciation for when the good times do get to come so you can share... and they come when one's attitude to receive is right.  You cannot receive if you do not give. 

Some people do go through life without a care or a thought for those around them and never help out their greater community.  If you choose not to help out your fellow man, then how can you expect to be helped yourself if you ever fall on hard times.  To lend a hand is divine and you gain more than you give.  To see a smile or a tear in another is a gift in itself.

I love my Sallies Chapter as they have stood by me and helped me through some very dark times without judgement or pressure.  Now that I am able to stand on my own once more is their reward.  They help all without question and sometimes I think, but this particular person is obviously going to the market to sell what you have provided.  And as one member leant over and quietly said, 'one day there maybe nothing of market value to give and instead a loaf of bread, then there will be no more market, but there will be food'.  They will still help these types as there usually are children involved so they find other ways in which to provide so that the children do not suffer.  Amazing people if you ask me.

Anyway, while my friend Kezza has been away she lent me her GPS.  As I am repping and on the road, even though I know my way around Melbourne more than most, I still have found this contraption invaluable in time saving.  I have now purchased one that was on sale and I talked them down for one that also give live traffic updates so I can avoid sitting in traffic.  I love it... thanks Kez.. you are a gem.  However, I still like the visual of a good old fashioned Road Map and hope they never stop printing them.  But I fear that that type of expertise my diminish.  Such is progress.

My front garden that was looking gorgeous now has weeds again.  Didn't have enough dosh for the mulch.  Will have to kill the weeds once the rains die down and hopefully by that time will have the dosh to get the mulch to avoid the regrowth.  As you can tell I do not possess a green thumb.  That gene skipped me.  Living on the land is in my heritage, but it escaped me.  Sad, but true.

Four more weeks till my Christmas break which will be for 3weeks.  Time to get my projects under way and either complete or more than half way done.  Also, have a few laughs and some small snippets of serious downtime with the family.  Really looking forward to it for the first time since Mum died. 

It is time.

It is time to allow myself to receive joy.

And time has been very kind to me in some ways.

The week prior to Christmas I will be busy with getting things ready for Christmas Eve, but I will be planning on still 'chucking' the stuff out also.  Let's hope I actually do it.

The next few weeks will be busy as with my head down and bum (bottoms to you guys overseas) up with the silly season upon us.

Shopping centres are to be avoided at all costs at Christmas time if you ask me.  However, my job takes me into this very horror zone each day!

I will survive!

Till next time my friends.  Trust your preamble to Christmas or whatever celebration you have will be a fruitful and happy one.

Cheers from less loaded
Anita
xxx 

There comes a time when ya' just gotta say 'stuff it'!

Hi Guys,

Almost another month has passed us by.  Where does it ('time' that is) go?

Many times I have wanted to jump on and add a piece of news, but this new 'wonderful' job has me busy as.  I recently went on my maiden 'virginal' country voyage just last week.  Now not having done one of these ever, I had to nut out the timing of the drive and visits to my new customers.  I think I went a tad overboard on the first leg of the trip!

The first day was from the inner suburbs of Melbourne down to a place called Phillip Island and then snaked around the lower end of Victoria and then cut through the mid section of Victoria through to Morwell and then onto Traralgon for the first overnight stay in a B & B.  Sounds easy enough doesn't it!  NOT if it is raining the moment you leave home to almost 11 hours later to your destination!  I was a drowned rat and had it not been for the loan of a GPS from Kezzah, I would have been 'stuffed'!  Big huge thanks Kezzah!!! It truly was a life saver.

Not only did I have to deal with the rain the whole day long and unfamiliar roads, but at one stage I was sent off, by the police, at a road block off into the National Forrest!  Yes, folks, little lonesome me into the wilderness, full pelt of rain, starting to get dark on windy mountainous and at times dirt roads to goodness knows were!  At one stage, I had to traverse one section of the road that one half had given way from the side of the mountain... now that was scary... as I didn't know if the road that was left was stable and had no way of going back.  I made it through, but this little adventure added another 90 mins to my now already long day and I was getting very weary by now.  This is where the GPS came into play.  I had no idea where I was or heading and thankfully the GPS kept going and directing me out of this hell hole.  It more than likely added kilometers to the trip by taking same strange route, but out I did get.

As much as I found the GPS exceptionally wonderful as a tool.  It also spooked me out that some satellite high up in the sky could track me!!!  Just a thought.

You would think things would get better from there, but each day I was presented with yet another set of issues, which I wont go into here.  Suffice it to say, it was exhausting, enjoyable and glad I got through as now I will know better for next time.

All this driving played havoc with my back and will have to look into ways to support my back better for next time.  All a learning curve.

Now, I sit here with a cold and look at 'the stuff' around me and know in my head what I want to do, but my legs are in concrete and my want does not outway my inertia.  So I have decided to pack up the things I wanted to eBay and take those 2 huge garbage bin bags to the Sallies (Salvation Army) instead.  I have realised now that there is just not enough time to eBay. 

So 'stuff it' all, I say.  Out it goes.

But just where is my energy? 

It is a bugger getting older, as at times it stops you from doing what you really would like to do.  In days gone past, I was always on top of all the things in my life and home.  Many would comment how welcoming my home was, warm and friendly.  But after all the horror of life that got thrown my way in general and a certain person who just never stepped up to the moment along with illness (my son/Mum and myself and the death of my Dad) and caring and then inheriting so much more 'stuff' in abundance - it seems it has all gone pear-shaped or at least south. 

I know now deep down, I have made leaps and bounds in this area and made huge progress, but why does it not look that way just yet?  It has been 4 years since Mum passed away and I feel so trapped by it all still.  Mum so knew how much work she had placed upon my shoulders that had been, not long before, been placed on hers.  I dearly would like not to pass this baton on.  Mum intended to deal with her lot with my help, but the job (here in Melbourne) she did to get through life, a company she worked with for years instead gave her a blow in giving her cancer by not dealing with the way she worked with a chemical to test the threads, which was her job, via a then known '100% cancer causing chemical' and protecting her.  The guys who delivered the 'stuff' were kitted up fully in white 'all in one' suits and full head masks etc.  But this company never once put any OH&S in place for the people working in 'Quality & Control' EVER.... NOT ONCE.... shame on you 'and you know who you are' who are now off shore to avoid any responsibilty.

Bastards, I say to the Heads of this company, each and every one of them over those years who decided to forsake the health of their employees for the sake of a profit. I say this without any guilt as I know they know and they have made sure they avoided their end of responsibility in the demise of those employees who were placed in proximit of this substance.  Nice one 'you know who'!

By the time Mum found out, it was too late to make them accountable.  That and the fact that they were already operating off-shore by now.  One day I hope to make this chemical common knowledge like asbestos, so it can help others.  I just have to find a way how... along with everything else I have to do.  So feel free to pread the word about the chemical (called 'carbotetrochloroethaline' and is used in textiles, tanning and dry cleaning industries that in the end is like asbestos--- a death sentence... slowly).

This is where I have to be careful and try very hard to stay positive.  The negative and low feelings is the very time that things can slip back or stay static for way too long in the area of decluttering.  Even if I just get one item or bag out a week, in the end you keep the habit of letting go keep on going instead of doing nothing at all, which means you go nowhere fast.

This is the exact time it is the hardest to get going again.  And get going again I must.  So muster up Anita.

I talk about my situation and know that many have the same issues that they work hard at hiding.  Be it if you created it or inherited it.  I would love for this to not to be such a shameful thing to go through any longer. TV shows like 'Hoarders' show the extremes and only serve to perpetuate the shame rather than help the many who suffer.  I do believe this is not there intent.  The intent is to entertain.  But in the end it still ends up being not helpful.  If in some small way I could put a dint into de-stigmatising this type of plight, that in many cases are not so extreme for many many years and then one day the balance tips too much for a moment into the almost going into the horror side of things for a variety of reasons, to make it so no one feels like a leper, then that would be my payola.

Due to my recent experiencewith eBay, I have decided eBay is too time consuming.  If I had the time then it may work, but being time poor now it just is not feasible.  Take for example my 'hat' that I had up for sale... didn't sell... all that work... and poof... nada... nothing!  Kind of sad really.  So as promised, if it doesn't sell, off it goes to the Sallies.  I will pack these said items up and get my daughter to take them to the local drop off area nearby.  I am also going to fold down all these boxes that are taking over the carport from all the product I have received recently from my new job to give away into the recyle bin.  Yet another side issue to just make things more interesting... like I need that like a hole in the head right now.

My parents car that went to the local used car yard only a couple of weeks ago has already sold!  The guy bought it off me and it didn't even cover the rego price, but I didn't mind as it meant it was gone.  He slapped $1,900 on it after a polish etc and I must say looked really nice when I drove by the other day and saw it in the yard there for sale.  Hope whoever has bought it gets to enjoy it and gives them another year or two of life.

I did get the marble top to that garden setting by the way.  Will post a photo soon once I can afford the garden looking nice and together.

I am making a promise to me, that I will have those items packed for the Sallies by the end of this weekend... not 'the' weekend - as that could be 'any' weekend. Along with the empty boxes into the recycle bin that is due this week to be picked up. 

Once, I get on top of the bills, I will look into paying someone to come and help me declutter.  Now who could it be now!  Some one ruthless or gentle!  That is the dilemma. This I will have to give some serious thought to, as I do want a more reasonable carport area and a decent lounge to set up the Christmas tree this year.  It is time.  However, I don't have enough hours in each day to get it done on my own with all the other day to day commitments I have.  My guess is it will take at least 2 to 3 days with 5hours each day would do it along with my daughter taking the 'stuff' as we go to the Sallies. 

Now this is going to sound like an oxymoron to you all, but I really cannot stand the 'stuff' sitting around once it has been gone through!  Yes, you read right.  The trouble is, if it stays, once it is tended to there is a temptation to start sniffing around those 'thrown out' bags etc and start to 'regret' tossing said treasures away and retrieve them.  So, in my case I prefer them gone asap (as soon as possible) to resist taking the already thrown out item back once more.  Now you know that, the oxymoron should make sense.  Well, at least I hope it does.

Well, guys, tomorrow is another day and  the last day of this weekend to get my promises to myself done.

So, I state.... 'stuff it'!  Stuff the lot.  Let's see what happens... and till then... here goes... 

Cheers all
Anita... hoping I can keep my promise to myself ... at least this time round...

Whose driving who? The 'stuff' or moi?

Hi guys,

Well, it's been almost a month since I last posted. 

I am ashamed to say that I have not done all that much in the activity of purging the 'stuff'.  Notice how I don't say ... my 'stuff''.  This is a way of removing myself from 'it all'.   The less personal, the more detached I can become.  Anyway, the new job has been a huge part of that neglect.  It has been head down and bum up in concentrating on getting into what I need to do to make this a huge success and long lasting. 

I love my job and what Ido.

I certainly do no want another fiasco like my last job where I had only been there for 6 months and kicking goals when the boss tells me he has to 'let me go' due to loosing 3 huge clients.  That was in January and finished up at that job by the end of February and have to say my position has still not been filled.

Five months later I am now working for my new company who are wonderful.  The training, the people, the facilities are all excellent and most helpful.  I keep pinching myself to check that it is true! 

With my last job I had the good fortune and sense to get rid of the humongeous credit card.  I now live credit card free entirely and am so liberated by doing so.  This time round this job has allowed my to concentrate on changing the old war horse vehicle to an upgrade that can stand the mileage and accommodate the pamphlets and work gear that I have to travel with.

Prior to Mum passing away, I had a fantastic zippy car that I called the 'battle axe' as AXE was part of the rego plate.  It died in the bum due to the sheer amount of running around I had to do looking after Mum for many years and there was no way I could afford another car at that time and being that Mum recently, at that time, could no longer drive meant the logical thing to do was take on Mum's car so I could continue to look after her.  I never liked driving Mum and Dad's car.  It never felt like mine.  But I had no choice.  I had to keep looking after her and begger's don't get to be choosers do they now.  t has been over 30 years since I have chosen a car and finally I get to do just that.  Choose my own car. Below is the old jallopy that got me through till now! 

Thanks Mum from the bottom and top of my heart.  But it is time for her to go and me to make my own way.

She will get a new life in a used car yard where someone will get at least a couple of years out of her.  Being that I have kept her mechanically up an running and replaced nearly everything from shockers and all welsh plugs you could imagine.  She will cope with city runs, but not huge long day to day trips.  A good get-about, but not  rep car.  Behind this photo you can see the recent acquisition ... 'uggles' as I refer to it now!

Uggles and I!  Look happy, don't I?  This is me picking up the new wheels.  A Honda CRV Sports 2006 and a dream to drive, of which, I will be doing a hell of alot of in this new position.  I am not that keen on a black car, but this one ticked all the other boxes so I can live with the black.  I intend to tint the windows being that this is my office. 

Black on black on black... what a good look eh!

Me ... a road hog!  No way.

Now you can see why I have been remiss in my neglect to purging more of the 'stuff'.  Even though I have put some more bags of clothes in recycle bins, etc, I feel it hasn't been enough.  And on top of that, I promised myself I would no longer bring anything home from the hard rubbish that people put out. 

I have to confess that I lapsed miserably yesterday.

I just so happened to be passing in a very wealthy area, when I saw a young man placing these chairs out on the nature strip that looked in immaculate condition.  I stopped and enquired about these chairs with this chappy.  He told me that his Mum wanted to get rid of it to make way for a new smaller setting and that there was nothing wrong with it at all.  After a chat with his Mum, I was able to get all 4 chairs and will go to collect the table today.  She also had a custom made marble table top for the table, but one of her family had expressed interest in it and I will find out today it I am able to take that also.  It is beautiful and in fantastic condition and will look gorgeous in my backyard garden for us to enjoy this summer. 

BBQ's here we come!

So I having brought home the 4 chairs made of wrought iron with yet to pick up the table and hopefully will come with the marble top if I get extremely lucky, I will be one lucky lady.

Boy are these guy heavy.  Even the guy struggled with them.  So in case of any high winds this baby ain't goin' nowhere.  A quick wire brush over and a spray of shiny black and this will come up a treat.

Sigh...  the 'stuff' is meant to be going out ... not coming in!!!

You know what this means?

Yep, I will have to do some serious purging to justify bringing this setting home.

I can hear Kez now .... noooooo ... while she is flying off to Europe as we speak!!!  Don't worry Kez, I will resist the urge and promise not to look from now on.

By the way, I have already been told off for doing this by Gabs!

I love my friends who look out for me as it does help in me keeping a check on this very type of  behaviour from gettig out of hand and it easily can.  Believe me.  But that is a whole other story ... or blog in this case.

With that in mind, I have to go and chuck more crap out peoples.  That and post a hat to sell on eBay fo te Melbourne Racing Carnival.

Here it 'tis... a Peter Jago vintage original.  Bought nearly 30 years ago and the colour is the right one for this season as it so happens.  Never ever got to wear it and is in pristine condition.  Let me know what you think of it.

Good luck to those who continue with this very same struggle as 'moi' on a daily basis and know that you are not alone in this quest to live unemcumbered of  'too much'! 

How does that saying go... less is more! 

Well, we will find out one day soon enough.

Cheers to one and all
from getting happier by the day Anita
 

Again and again and again... I have had to learn patience!!!

Hi Guys,

I have found out once more what it feels like to wait.  That is eBay in a nutshell.

After you have set yourself up you then have to set up the shots for what you are selling and decide how long and make sure that the end date is a date where it is suitable for those bidding on said items to do so and so on.  You have to constantly check for emails, messages and queries and respond.  Then once the winning bid goes through you then encounter even more obstacles to manouver around and then there's PayPal.  Well, that just adds another layer to your 'to do' lists.  Like as if you don't have enough to do already ... that one invariably doesn't get done all that quickly anyway!

But after having gone through the process I am now set up.  I didn't do brilliantly and I certainly cannot buy that car as yet.  Nonetheless, the diamonte shoes went into a cyberland bizo as I put down no PO Box addresses and this person wanted it to and there has been no ended of tooing and throwing.  But I am sure that will be settled soon enough. 

It so happened that that blog had the most hits!!!  Was my story?  Or the diamonte shoes?  Or my daughters feet?  Never the less it proved a huge hit.  In the end some guy in another state just had to have them.  Don't ask as a woman never tells...

Anyway, then I had placed 3 items of clothing.  Two were bought with one not.  Didn't make anything but am learning as to what is sellable.

The learning curve is steep ... very steep indeed.

I haven't had much time to do any decluttering, but now September has come along and our annual hard rubbish day has finally been and gone as you know and there has now been even more going out this time round.

Here is just some of what got thrown out this time round that really wasn't worth giving to anyone.  However, the 2 bikes went first followed by an oil heater with the lead cut off for safety reasons.  What anyone would want with that just makes me puzzled, but it went as soon as I put it out. 

I mean, where do these people come from.  You turn your back for just a second and 'poof' an item is gone!  Just like that.  Total stealth if you ask me.

I wasn't the only one getting rid of rubbish.  The council only do this once a year and the suburb just looks like a tip for about 2 to 3 weeks as some people put it out wayyyyy too early and others the weekend you are told and then the council don't pick it up that week and leave the whole mess for others to ravage and make the street look even worse by the time the guys who do this work come along to retrieve it all. 

I am more used to a council that provides this service 3 to 4 times a year on call, which means the streets don't look like a tip.

On top of that my lawn mower guy came to cut the grass while my pile was there and I now have a nice unmowed patch where all the junk used to be while waiting to be collected!

But still looks way better than it was!



Voila!!!  All gone.

But wait there's more!!!

And this is where the patience comes in. 

I deal with one lot at a time. 

One segment at a time. 

One shelf at a time. 

One drawer at a time. 

One box at a time. 

And with each one done comes a small victory. 

More out of the way.

More gone. 

More dealt with. 

But, boy o boy, would I love for this process to go faster. 

Must find more patience...

This picture will show where I am heading next.  One of my mega piles. 

This mega pile are boxes of stuff most will be given away and some items good enough to eBay.  But it must be dealt with and gone by Christmas.  It is time.

Same pile with the POV from the porch!

Kind of makes you want to go and run away now doesn't it.  But, just think, I had at least 20 times more of this 'stuff' that is now GONE! 

It is what you no longer SEE that is important. 

That is why one who has found themselves in a situation of being classified a 'hoarder' be it of their own doing or inherited and in my case both and it was the inherited that tipped my over the edge that you find you don't give yourself credit when each and every items does GO OUT FOR GOOD. 

Because, there is more that you can still see.

It is quick and easy to forget the small victories.  But it is extremely important to add these up and remember how far you have travelled and how much you have achieved.

Here is the other mega pile! 

Being brave now showing you lot these photos.

This lot I have shown you guys has to be either thrown out, given away or eBayed. 

My rule with this lot will be if I need to keep something and take it inside ... two  items inside must then be taken out of the house to replace what is being taken in, so I don't add to what I have there already and lessen what I have inside.  Clever.  I will do this. 

I call this the 'Addis' factor.  It is a suggestion one of my friends made to me long long time ago and now finally being implemented.  Hey, Addis!  What do you think of that?

Even though I have downsized from 2 and a half houses to maybe 1 and a quarter, it still is alot of 'stuff' for me to deal with. 

I still after tackling this lot have the last areas to go through:- 

The small shed. 

The lot (not much) at the side of the house. 

And last, but not least the Attic. 

Then a serious look in cupboards and shelves that I haven't tackled and then my job is complete.

I make it sound like a piece of cake don't I now.  But it is far from that. 

I have to keep reminding myself that little by little I am getting there.  That light at the end of the tunnel isn't so small any more. 

I have to keep reminding myself not to be ashamed of having found myself in this situation.  That in time I will be out from under all this 'stuff'.

I have to keep my sense of humour and know that in the end I will still be able to do just that.  Laugh freely.

Just as long as I keep finding my 'patience' that is.

Cheers guys

hope you stick at it also

from not so impatient Anita

ps... another huge bag of clothes is out the door tonight as well...  gotta love that! And again ... chime in any time. 

Why Hoarders are shy and try to hide!

Hi Guys,

Well, I haven't written for a while now, as I have just started a new job! 

Finally, after 5 months of looking I now have my dream job.  After I catch up on debts, I will be able to 'pay' others to get my work of decluttering done more easily and with less stress involved for me.

This new Dashboard 'blog' look is very useful.  I get to see how many have read my blog and an overview from where! 

At first I thought I was writing to myself only.  Now it appears there are those out there as far as Alaska reading about my efforts to declutter my 'stuff'. 

Why I can say we are a shy lot --- and those who know me know that I am NOT shy --- but when it comes to my clutter I do get very 'antsy' for a better word, when someone says they are coming to visit me!!!  Now that sends shock waves right through me and into such a dither that I just want to go and hide away somewhere till it is all over.  They don't know that it was double trouble and has taken me over 5 years to get to this point in my decluttering!  All they will see is the 'mess' and not the 'progress'! 

This is where I find myself 'explaining' my situation.  Invariably, all say 'don't worry about it'.  But, hey, guys, get real... we will still worry and fret.

It even happened to me in reverse the other day as I was to meet up with friends and ended up with me visiting a friend who was at another friends house.  The friend's friend was saying 'no no no' in the background (we were on a mobile/cell call) and thankfully my friend said she was not keen on me seeing how her 'home' looked.  To which I said 'she should see mine'!!!  I did end up there and I did manage to settle her nerves, fears and worries and told her of my situation and she relaxed.  And to be quite honest we were on par and just goes to show there are many of us out there struggling in silence alone, which is so unnecessary. 

This is why I decided to not hide any longer.  We can find comfort and solace in communicating with each other who understand the struggle.  Instead of hiding, we should come out bold as and help ourselves and each other without the shame and judgement that is always there in the air lingering like a bad smell.

Why I also say we are a shy lot is some have found me on facebook and communicated with me directly their horrendous problems that would be difficult to overcome.  Yet, not one person has commented on my blog directly.  I can understand this as that would then highlight that you may have the same issue.  I decided long ago to not worry too much about what others think and let it as they say in comedy's 'let it all hang out'!

Till then I lived in shame and horror against judgement about my plight and situation by those who were judging without knowing the full story.  This is human.  This is normal. This is what we ALL do, even me.  One day I will be brave enough to place photos of my progress... those photos that I have dared to take.  Like as if there is no evidence then no one will be the wiser and I can easily fool myself and whitewash it much more easily that it never really existed.

So if you do feel so inclined to chime in, whether you have a struggle with 'stuff' or not, please do.  As this is a forum to help each other where all judgment is left out of the equation.  Not one person has ridiculed me for writing about my journey.  If anything, I have had only pure support, which has helped me enormously.

So please try not to be shy.

Onto my next efforts, which is that I have a 'hard rubbish' collection the local council organises once a year where I live. 

My adult daughter will help, but lord knows in what state she will be in seeing she only got in around 3am. 

My teenage son is to help also.  And again lord knows in what state as he is still at a 'sleep over' at a mates place overnight and that usually means one cranky dude rocks up.  This time he is bringing a mate along to help as well.  So two cranky dudes.  Oh what fun.

My saviour will more than likely be the last minute offer of help from a longtime and dearest girlfriend. 

I am sure between the sleepyheads and the two of us shall fill the nature strip (curb for those in the US etc) in no time.

Then I have to get the yard ready for tree lopping and clearing.  It is all taking shape.

After getting the weeds in the front yard removed, surprisingly people in the street began smiling and commenting as they walked passed my home.  All very friendly all of a sudden! 

Also, a few of my friends felt compelled to tell me they drove passed my place as they no longer recognised it!  Now I do think that is going too far... no matter how funny it is... no all in good humour.  At least this means I am making progress, as slow as it is.

Now all I have to do is kill the grass, clover and wondering dew and after a while, now thanks to my new job, get a crap load of mulch to suppress the regrowth.  I have 'Wild Iris's' to mass plant and they should clump out for a low maintenance garden bed in our dry aussie harsh climate.

This shot was taken not long after the weeding of the front and side.  If you take a careful look under the carport you will see what is left to be sorted through.  Not ideal as it is cold in winter and one does not feel like sorting out in the elements, which tends to halt my progress.  Even though I look like that british show from years gone by, 'Steptoe & Son', under the carport, it is the only area I have to store the 'stuff'.  At least it is all in one place now.  But there is more inside to be dealt with as well... the carport is not the only area to be dealt with by any stretch of the imagination.
 
Wish me well with the 'hard rubbish' today that I will be dealing with shortly.  Will try and take a photo as a momento to remind me that I am 'getting there'.

Happy decluttering everyone and will check in soon with more updates.

Cheers to one and all
from one 'getting' very happy Anita

How fast can a month go by - very!

Hi Guys,

Well well well who would've believed that this month would go so fast.  I have not done a scrap of work in my decluttering, which really is appalling.

Shame on you, I hear you say!  Well, yes, but like I have said before, LIFE has it's plans as well and loves just getting in the way of such well-intentioned ones at that.

I have been looking for a paying part-time job for some months now and have finally got that position.  Luckily, it is my dream job.  Due to the steep learning curve and training I will be going through, my days will be long and busy for some months to come.  It is essential that I put my entire focus into this new position at the very beginning if I want my performance in carrying out this wonderful job to be of a high standard and continue well into the future, it will be head down and bottoms up.  Once I 'bed' down all the huge volumn of new information into my memory banks, I wont be so tired and will find my new 'routine' that will allow me to do all my other projects, within the major one called 'Decluttering'!

My daughter has gone overseas and I did intended while she was gone to sleep in her room to work on my own bedroom, which hasn't happened!  The sleeping has.  But not my bedroom!

Today, I do have some time along with part of tomorrow.  So all wont be a total loss.  It's an opportunity that I shouldn't let go by, no matter how tired I feel.  And because I have this job, I can now feel even more confident in throwing out, giving away or donating more of what is in my very small bedroom!

I do have to find out when the next hard rubbish is on and believe it is soon.  Will need to organise some big burley bods to come and shift the yard rubbish onto the front nature strip and then maybe throw a snag on the BBQ at the end as a thankyou.  Again, with this new job I will be able to afford to get the front and backyard into order and liveable once more.  Ah, the freedom of cash flow.  Kashing!  I can see the dosh already flowing through my fingertips. 

I am so grateful to have this job as it will now speed up my process of decluttering. 

You usually find when you are working you tend to do more.  Funny, but true.  I will say this now and hope that in writing it here, that it will come true.  But, I do foresee several areas sorted by Christmas! 

There, I have said it out loud for all to see.  Hmmm, now I've gone and done it.  I'll have to do it now won't I?  Ah, nothing like a challenge made to one self.  I should take photos of the areas in mind to keep for Christmas time.  Let's see if I am brave enough to post them here with the after shots after Christmas!  Time will tell if the job gets done and as to how brave I am.  We shall see.

I did finish Corinne Grants book about her journey with all her 'stuff''.  Now that was interesting.  Alot of what I had already written she had written exactly the same in areas of her publication.  Now that is spooky.  All 'us' people who hold onto stuff 'sound the same'.  Truly spooky.  It was like she had read my blog before I wrote it.  But how could she... her book was already published.  And I certainly had started my blog before a friend lent her copy to me.  So, there is something more to this 'keeping stuff'' than most would realise.

One thing is for sure.  It isn't an easy journey to travel for anyone. 

Corinne's book was a very interesting read with helpful solutions.  But I felt she rushed the part where she finally turned her corner to confront her 'stuff''demons.  I wanted more of her banter at that particular time and place where she found herself.  I felt jipped!  However, I did get her point.  The futility of it all.  The plight of others.  When you stop looking within and starting realising what is happening around you, can at times, have the desired effect that it had for her.  But, I wanted more.  More of just that moment.  We all know how difficult this journey is on the way there.  But not much about that moment when it hits you as to how to finally deal with it, once and for all time to come. I wanted to read about the new found strong emotions it took to 'get it' and the process to keep it once you 'got it'.  And how you need to maintain your 'thinking and space' the way you see it in your minds eye if any!  In other words, the end few chapters felt rather rushed after the leisurely way she shared her youth in detail and I felt this area could've been fleshed out some more and quite frankly deserved it.  Other than that it was a good read.

Her slog after having that realisation finally dawn on you, as to how to deal with the overload, took about a year in her case, as I understood going by the book. 

For me it wasn't so 'night and day' or 'black and white'. 

There was a final moment, where I too also turned that corner, but I had been hovering at that corner for some time with little bits of 'moments' coming my way to finally push me to go around rather than sneak looks and turn that corner.  For me it has taken more years to get there and hopefully it wont take too many years to complete the task. 

Each of our journey's will vary.  But as long as you keep trying to search for your own unique individual key to get there, you will get there in the end.  If you continue to do just that, you will find that space that you desire in the end and keep it that way.  Including, having a life and enjoying it at the same time.

Off now to work on my bedroom. 

No more delays, no more excuses. 

Maybe, a cuppa tea before I start!  To allow me to contemplate where to begin.  You know this is not to delay.  You don't believe me!  Well, you will just have to trust I mean what I write and write what I do... well, nearly ... mostly ... ah, bugger it ... just go do it .....

Chookas to you all
The journey continues
So till next time
TTFN from one very relieved and overjoyed Anita!


ps...  oh happy dayz... oh happy dayz...  now sing it out loud!  OH HAPPY DAYZ...

Full circle!

Hi Guys,

As I said, I was going to get the last of the boxes from my neighbours garage over to my place. 

Sue, my buddy, who was the first to help over 4 years ago now to pack up the 2 bedrooms filled to the brim so I could move in quickly to be with Mum to look after her 24/7 in her fight against cancer.  It was Sue who helped me pack up the 2 rooms along with Mum sitting in the corridor watching and checking what we were doing.  This process took awhile as Mum had to tell me the story about each item, who it belonged to, the event attached to it and what provinance it had to our family.

There I was in the garage last Saturday, realising that these were the very first boxes that Sue and I packed together with Mum what now seems like all those years ago.  Talk about emotional. 

We got the items over to my place and I knew that even though it wouldn't take long to sort through it, it was still bittersweet that we were now full circle.  Sue and I took these boxes to May's and now here we were bringing them back.  I didn't plan it that way.  It just happened.

There are now only 6 items of large pieces of my own personal furniture left.  I have given all the rest away to others who would more than likely never be able to afford these pieces of furniture.  At least I know they are well used and appreciated.

On top of all this I have been weeding the front garden, which had run away from me.  John who came to do the job had done one fantastic job along with my and Zigis's assistance.  Now to mass plant some hardy plants and heavily mulch and the front yard will look well kept once more.

As for the last of the boxes, well, apart from the 6 pieces over the road, all my stuff is finally all in one place for the first time in 5 years!

I think I can safely say we have arrived at the hump of the load of 'stuff'.  If only I could make headway by Christmas, I then would be one very happy woman.

I would like to enjoy my family home before I have to sell.  Well, that is the plan.

Now I have to make sure I go through the boxes and not just let them sit there.  There is that danger as this has pricked up some emotional parts in me.  Even though you know your loved ones are gone, for those who hold onto 'stuff' this then can be made an attachment to that.  I do not want to be bogged down ever again and have to make sure I do not dawdle in sorting through these particular boxes.

I don't think I am in danger of that and more than likely is why I am writing it down here to force me to not dwell, but to move forward as I have been doing.

You cannot and I mean cannot take all this 'stuff' with you.  All you can do is leave the good stuff and not ALL the stuff to loved ones.

Mum knew what she had left me.  It was Mum and I who sorted through her Mum's place that took the best of a year to do taking 2 to 4 days each week to achieve it.  No one else in the family was willing to help us so we slogged on together regardless.  She didn't mean to leave me in such a mess, but cancer robbed her of her time and plans.  Never leave it as you just never know what is around that corner called 'time'.  Some things you just have to do there and then.

Now I have reached my 'hump', it is all uphill from now on.  Or is that downhill?  Let's see how I do and how long I take!  This is my challenge to me.

Cheers for now
Anita - who now has to pull her finger out!

And getting closer to being 'unloaded'.