You have a BBQ!!!

Hi Guys,

That time again... and fortunately I have some time to sit and write for a change.

This new job has me coming and going from hither to nither and I must say the tiredness has not waned a jot. 

However, I am glad to be gainfully employed.   Things could be worse as many are losing there jobs right now with a very uncertain future.  I have been there at the steps of uncertainty for years now and like the fact that this time round I am not on that Merry-Go-Round.  But that can all change within a heartbeat as I well know by personal experience.

Now what's this title all about ... 'you have a BBQ!!!'. 

Well, I found this quite amusing and perplexing all at the same time. 

Peoples perceptions can be vastly differing to your own and when you realise that it can be either very liberating and interesting or downright confronting.

Let's go back to earlier today, which my dear friend Sue came to help me with my laundry top cupboards, which had all the blankets placed there just before my Mum died.  It was Sue who helped me while Mum told both of us the story of each item as we went at that very time with Mum.  Mum doing this held us up, but we listened patiently with due respect to my Mum's stories all the same and I am so pleased now that we did.

One of the blankets up there was from the war years in Europe.  I think I have mentioned this before about this blanket.  During her time at the end of the war Mum and Grandmum ended up in a German Displacement Persons Camp.  They were given basics, but some items were extremely uncomfortable to say the least.  Blankets were no exception.  No goose feathers here.  Grandmum somehow managed to get some cotton sheets to make the very rough army blankets they had been given into a quilt so that they could use without being scratched to death by the coarse blankets to be able to sleep more comfortably in the confined quarters after WWII.  She sewed them together and to see it now fills me with wonder about the life that had to endure and the moments that they escaped from and somehow lived to tell the tale.

I am so grateful to my friend who calmly and quietly set about getting these blankets down.  I got rid of most of the blankets except for 2 pure woollen Onkaparinka blankets, one Mohair tartan and another from Albany Australia.  The rest have gone to the Salvation Army already as I write this.  Many warm blankets going to good families. 

As for the Quilt from WWII I will take that to the Immigration Museum and see if they have any interest in its story along with a picture of my Mum and Grandmum in said Displacement German Camp.  If not I will keep it with the story attached to it for the family future generations.  Maybe it will survive.  Maybe it wont.  But, at least it will be there for a little while longer.

I will have to take a picture and add at a later date.  Have put it back up and have no way of getting it now that all the tall people have gone for the day.

Sue and I then tackled the Christmas decorations in the corridor to place up in said laundry top cupboard.  We first tackled items under the carport.  Collapsing empty boxes and going through the plastic containers I had, which then made more bags for the Sallies.  With 2 containers and the right sized boxes in hand we boxed up the Christmas decorations, Christmas paraphanalia such as hats (I have many different ones that I like to keep and rotate and use as each chrissy passes by) along with the small Christmas Tree and lights as well as a box with presents that I have bought to be given in the future.  They all now with a spot to live in.

Here is where they have been since the last clear out waiting for the laundry area to be dealt with.

Poof... now they are gone!!!

I also placed my beach stuff up there and will also place my camping gear up there.  Seasonal items that we all use, but on an annual basis.  Being that I don't have a garage it makes sense to place these items in this space till I get up into the attic, which will be last to tackle.

After that was done, my daughters boyfriend came to check out the front and back yard situation.

Now, here is where I got the title for this instalment. 

My daughter says to her boyfriend could he come and have a look at our backyard BBQ to check that it is still in operational condition and if not to be put out with the Hard Rubbish Collection.  To which he responded in a somewhat higher pitch '... you have a BBQ?...'. 

I had to laugh as the backyard is a jungle now and being in desperate need for help to turn the tide of nature.

This is some of how the triffids have taken over...

And this particular plant is still in it's pot!

We walked around discussing my 'wants' and what was required to get the place back into ship shape, including guttering and the roofing and the chopping and lopping and the pruning and the turfing and the list goes on and on and on.  But we have a starting point now and we also can achieve it in a few weekends! 

That first BBQ is looking good as apparently the BBQ is salvagable.

We then set our sights on placing items on the nature strip for the up and coming Council Hard Rubbish Collection.  Sue, myself, my daughter and her boyfriend piled the gear that had piled up under my carport and front lawn onto the front nature strip.  We even managed some stuff from the backyard.  Photos further down.

Here is a picture of daughter's boyfriend pondering what he has got himself into.

Here are some before and afters with the removal of rubbish.

From the above to the below where I now can park my car further up under the carport.

OK, I know what you are thinking... 'but it's not all done!'.  True.  But I take my wins where and when I can.  What is behind all that lot is my eBay stuff.  I would like to make a little cash out of all my hard earns if I can.  Otherwise, off to the Sallies it goes anyway.

More before and afters of the front nature strip and front yard.

From that to this and you can see where my beautiful daughter left her calling card from her car... grrr... anyhoo to this...

and in preparation for Council Hard Rubbish Collection

from this to hohum...

more hohum...

Missy is trying to get in on the act by helping with the rubbish bags, but that window keeps getting in the way...

Sue has helped and on her way with her birthday gifts from Aija and set a time for the dinner for a belated celebration.  You can see more rubbish has piled up to be placed in bins as the weeks go by, but some nice neighbour may allow me to use their space if I ask nicely...

That about wraps it up for this time round.

Will be putting out more rubbish from the backyard next week and booking dates to get the yard back into order.

After cleaning and dealing with inside my daughter feels it is now time for the hoarder whisperer to come back to help me in the lounge room.  So glad she is beginning to see the picture of the domino effect and that it does take time and bucket loads of patience.

My shoulders are sore and my heart is content. 

And so my journey continues.

Till next time guys.  Life is but a journey. 

How long we have or how far we go and what we choose to do it with is all up to sheer luck and our choices.

Well I am echoing bucket loads...

Just love Ladybugs... no other reason for this picture...

Now I am concentrating more on 'times' that make me happy.

I will love and leave you with that one.

Cheers to you all till next time,
Anita
.... who is still getting there! 

Where did the last year go?

Hi Guys,

Well, well, well, well, well!

Went to the local council offices the other day to get the rates put into my name.  It had been since Mum died in 'The Late Estate of Zaiga and so forth' and since I have finalised the Will 18 months earlier than required, this meant there are many changes to be made. 

Very excitment!

While there, I enquired when the next hard rubbish collection was slated.  I cannot tell you the enthusiasm of the said council receptionist had, other than to drone.. '... youuu willll beee sent a noticeeee soooon...'! 

I mean, there I am, standing in front of her, flabberghasted that she couldn't look up a list to say such and such a date for that address of which I had said out loud.  I looked behind me to check if she was distracted by some event happing, but no, nothing and I looked at her and asked politely once more '... whennnn issss theee nexxxt harrrrd rubbbbbish collection going to beeee for such and such an addresssss.....'.  At this point my over enthusiastic receptionist just keeps looking at me and we continue to stare at each other.

I won.

Finally, after a lifetime of minutes, she looks to her computer ever so slowly (this is a passive aggressive tactic) and types in the address and then states.... '.... it will be 11 August....'...!!!!! 

Ye gads, that is only 4 weeks away ... when the hell were they going to notify the residants... I need time to prepare... time to ask and organise help... no wonder many places complain about the council to the council... now there's an oxymoron if I ever heard one... complaining to the very people you are complaining about!

OK.  There we have it.  I am now officially sent into a tailspin. 

The reason why is I have a show that I am working on being held next week, which will take me at least a week to recover from and that weekend was to be my recouperating weekend, which now has gone with the wind.

I need time to digest, think, strategies, organise and then put into action all that I plan and have to do to take advantage of the 'ONE AND ONLY' hard rubbish collections for the year.

Lucky I asked!

I mean, I missed the last one and cannot afford to miss this one.  Well, I think I did. 

I really want to stop looking like 'steptoe and son' personified.  It all takes time and also money of which I have very little of both right now.  So this hard rubbish collection is important not to miss.  On the 4th and 5th of August I will try and get some strong pals to come along and help me get the gear on the front nature strip in a neat and tidy fashion.  I may even be able to get some to help with pruning as well while we are at it. 

Yet another step closer to my final vision.

In the meantime, my daughter helped me last weekend clearing out the entire junk in the laundry and I did a cursory cull behind the cupboard doors as well.  At the very top, which is very high up were some air bagged blankets that my Mum insisted on keeping and my friend Sue and I had placed now just over 5 years ago while Mum was with us just before she went into palliative care. 

Aija just didn't have the heart to deal with this right now as one of the blankets was my Mum and Grandmum's blanket from the German Displaced Person's Camp they were in that they had stitched together to make a quilt of sorts.  I plan to go to the Immigration Museum here in Melbourne CBD and see if they are interested in having it along with pictures of my Mum and Grandmum in said camp era.  There is also a crochetted blanket from my sister Sylvia she gave me a long time ago.  It is Queen size with black border and multi colour internal squares, which I shall keep.  Apart from those the rest can go to the Sallies.

I did take a photo of Aija helping me as she looked so funny with her makeshift face protector from dust.  But I am banned from showing it as I was told there would be dire consequences if I did.  I did take some without her in them and will share next time with you all.

Sue has since offered to help me get them down as she is much taller than me to make space for the chrissy tree plus decorations and things like those other once a year items such as camping gear etc.

I now have the 3 baskets set up to place the dirty washing in as you go and only have put back into the laundry what belongs in the laundry.  Due to this it made more room in the lounge room and corridor.  We were left with 4 huge garden rubbish bin bags full to the brim and one for the Sallies and some for eBay.  All now under the ever growing carport spillage.  Most of which has to be placed on the nature strip for the hard rubbish collection. 

This eBay pile is getting bigger by the minute as we;; and I will have to make time to place on either eBay or Gumtree to get that moving out to fund the much needed home repairs.  But finding that precious time is proving more difficult than I would like.

All this work I am doing is snowballing into more work!

Now how does that work?

This working 5 days a week is doing my head and strength in.  It has been 2 months now and am still not yet in a proper routine.

But all this pain will be all worth it in the end.

In the meantime, one of my 'new' pals calls me last week in tears. 

It turns out a 'nice thoughtful' neighbour had complained to their local council, where upon 2 burly council men turn up to her door unannounced demanding to search her property inside and out.  Which she declined.  Now this is uncalled for if you ask me.  I do not know what this friends situation is or how it looks, but I do know and understand at how helpless and powerless we can be at doing anything speedily about the situation.

People in our situation usually don't have the strength physically or mentally or emotionally to do the work entirely on our own and need help and this bully tactics just made matters worse and made her even feel more alone and reclusive.  Imagine 2 huge male strangers coming to your door making all sorts of accusations and demands.  It would scare the life out of you is what. 

All I can say is I am thankful that my neighbours understand the plight I inherited and was placed in and have been extremely supportive ever since. I mean, not even robbers have bothered to look at my junk.  Like I said, I am not sure to be glad about that or highly insulted!

It would be nice if this so called 'do gooder' neighbour saw and recognised her struggle and offered to lend a hand or a shoulder rather than this underhanded and outright nasty behaviour of hiding behind a 'letter of complaint' cloaked in secrecy!

I am not able to do much for my friend who lives in another state, but I sure as hell can lend my emotional support.  I have offered to write a draft letter to the council asking for help as these men have scared the crap out of my friend and now lives in fear.  I am in the process of drafting this for her right now, of which I will send when I get the multitude of everything else done.  But this person I must help.

Life is a journey.  How we choose to behave and treat others is a true measure of who we are not what is around us and how it is placed.

And as to how we act, doesn't always tell all what is truly going on inside.

To all the dibby dobbers, I say, just take a minute to think if it were you in that situation and what you would like to happen to you before this was done to you before doing this to another and how it effects them.  The time you took to write a letter of complaint or make that call to complain you could have gone over and knocked on that door and asked... 'how can I help you?' ... 'would you like a few hands to assist you at the next hard rubbish collection?' ... 'could we prune some of the overgrowth and place it in the recyle bin for you?'... anything would be better than pointing the finger of scorn.

I know I sound idealistic here and people are people after all, but this would be my personal preference all the same.

I help my elderly neighbour from time to time as I know she can no longer do these things for herself.  She has some help from what little family she has, but it is nice for her to see a human soul from time to time as she said once to me that there are days when she sees no one.  It doesn't take much to 'think' what one can do. 

Afterall, we all live on the same one and only unique planet that we know of so far.  We may as well get along.

I know I need help and am learning to 'ask'.  I also can see where help is needed and don't hesitate to offer what I am capable of doing where I can.

If we all help each other in a small way every so often, then we would have less hardship for many to suffer.

Here's the drum.  I have the Wrokdown show to put on next week, then regather myself and then spend the following weekend getting the hard rubbish out and then the following week a 'friends and family' gathering of sorts.  Not sure if I will survive all this!!!  May need a break at a resort of some sort.  That or an all over 2 hour massage would do.

I certainly have my work cut out for me for the next month.  You may not hear from me till after that, but I will be sure to take photos of the process.  See Kezza... I took notice.

This is usually how I have operated much of my life...

In the end I will get it done albeit even if it is at the last minute. 

Like I said.  Life is a journey and I plan to enjoy what is left and leave the stress and angst behind...

Cheers till next time...
Anita

BOO! I'M BAAAACK!!!

Hi Guys,

Was I lost?  I have been gone for some time.  So what happened to me to be away from here so long?  Well, what hasn't happened to me!

For starters I started that job I mentioned I had an interview for in the last blog and this time FULL TIME!!!  I cannot cope!  It is too much!  Four days work and 3 day weekend was just perfect.  That extra day gone is doing me in to no end.

Not only do I have less pay and for more days I also took on a new territory - the North/West whereas I used to do South/East.  So not only will I have new products to learn, I will be learning a whole new territory, the people, the parking and so on.

First off, I have yet another confession to make, I promised to take photos last time of the before and after shots from when the Declutter Whisperer was here - the wonderful Kim.  I must admit when she sent them to me I kind of, sort of, well..... didn't want to post them.  Hopefully, by the time I finish writing this I can find the 'hutspah' to share them with you here.  OooAah, this is more confronting than I first thought.  This letting it all hang out isn't what I thought it would be cracked up to be ... hope that makes sense!

Anyway, this is what has transpired since last I posted.  Now where do I begin....

It has been almost 2 months and am determined to do at least one blog for June end, which is only hours away by now.

Well, I had plans of putting in the heating only first and stagger the jobs to make the money last longer and build up as I go so I had a buffer.  Best laid plans never go to plan!  Do they now?  Well, not for me.

As luck or timing had it the old original copper boiler in the ceiling from 1961 decided to give up the ghost.  Did I dare say that Heating would win first... well the hot water system had other ideas in store for me.

I had no idea till I called the plumber that water was pouring out of a pipe at the side of the house as to how serious it was till he ordered me to turn off the water immediately and fortunately for me, Ray came to our rescue the very next day.  Sure we lived without water for a few days, but it could have been worse.  Due to the fact that he was here anyway and also installs split systems, I decided to do all the jobs at once and put in the HWS and Heating along with hooking up the toilet to utilise the tank water as well as the washing machine, which can use mains or tank as the need suits.

This has meant dust and plenty of it.  Dust everywhere.  So over the dust.

My daughter was spared all this pain as she was overseas enjoying herself in the sun.  Boy was she ever lucky. 

As with all jobs one problem usually shows up many more and I found out the pipe behind the toilet system was about to burst so yet more expenditure.  Also, I have been slowing paying back smaller debts that have been outstanding for some time with some very patient debtors.

I was hemorrhaging money left, right and centre.

But the pressure of the water has been worth the pain.  And as for the heating!!!  Unbelievable.  I just hope it will end up cheaper to run that the oil column heaters that I have had to use all these years in this house.  The next bill will tell all.  Here's hoping.

I will get more solar panels put on the roof at some stage to help reduce the electricity bill.  But that will have to wait a little while longer now.  Will get a quote to see if it is doable now or as I suspect later on.

I haven't drawn breathe since Kim was here to assist me in decluttering the lounge room, which is where we decided to start.  After this experience I will have her back again in blocks as she really was a gun.  At one stage I think she looked a tad overwhelmed, but forged on forth without complaint.  She was onto all my tricks and niggles and allowed me some of my more 'emotive' moments.  I in return let her do her thing so I could see the final 'canvas' most of which I have left as I like it that much.

We worked together solidly for nearly 5 hours.  She achieved much more than I ever could have in as many months.  By trusting her I got alot done.  There was stuff for the bins, stuff for the sallies and stuff to go to specific areas.  It felt good and better still it looked good.

The surprising thing was my children's reactions when they saw what we achieved.  They were truly blown away.  My daughter's boyfriend wanted to know if I had been robbed!  Now that was hilarious. 

She actually listened to what I had to say and as to how I wanted it to feel like in the end.  We will do this in stages as most hinges on when my daughter moves out early next year.  Like a domino effect.

When my daughter does move out, I paint that room and move in.  Then I paint my old room and move all the computer and other furniture that is to go in there making more room in the lounge and dining room area instantly.  I then plan to paint the corridor, bathroom, laundry and toilet areas.  The last will be lounge and then the kitchen/dining area.  This will take years, but I don't mind.

This coming weekend I will attack the laundry area and then only put back in there what belongs.  Then what is left in the corridor most of will then go to the Sallies.  Her boyfriend will in late July start helping me srt out alot of the major pruning of the garden in stages and hopefully wont need to pay a huge amount for a gardener.  I so want that BBQ area set up by Spring to enjoy finally.

Ray the plumber had an electrician here who quoted me for some fix up jobs and a friend a carpenter to fix the attic surround and then I should be done for a while.  There goes my holiday for the moment.  But it will be all worth it. 

In the meantime, I start my new full time job and my head is spinning.  I also had to attend a conference at the Gold Coast so I really was turned upside down in my day to day routine.

OK... I will be brave and show you my before and after shots of the lounge room, which still is a work in progress.

This is of the book shelf area near the kitchen... the heater you see is an old oil heater that is no longer in use.  Just there for decoration now.

Before

 

After

This is looking from the dining room area into the lounge area where I keep all my DVD's, VHS's (and yes I still do use them), CDs etc and you get to see my Mum's old Tredle Sewing Machine.  This will go into my room once I get to move into the main bedroom once my daughter leaves, hence waiting, waiting and more waiting.  But I have waited this long I don't mind helping my daughter get back up on her feet once more.

Before

After 

Since this area has been decluttered the cat now curls up in that bowl!

Well that wasn't so bad was it?  Well yes, but I have to share in order to let go and move on.

For the time being I will have to get myself used to working full time, the product information and the huge amounts of kilometres in travel.  I am still managing to participate with Wrokdown at least, which is my love job.  We have a show for 21 July.  Just a little something else to do.

I am glad that the Will has been finalised, but it still has twinges of bittersweet feelings wrapped up the whole saga.

I have lost my Dad some years ago who I miss dearly.  I have lost my Mum closely followed by my much loved sister in crime not all that long ago.  My remaining older sibling who never liked me took this opportunity to crucify me and place me on the outer of her family and my much loved sisters daughter.  How could this happen.  Quite easily really if one holds enough loathing within them. 

I miss all three who I was extremely close to and have finally accepted there is nothing I can do about the living and the breathing relo left standing.  This next picture is of a quote that I find profoundly fitting.

Life is way too short to pander to the demands and bullish behaviour of a so called blood relative.  So I have finally chosen not to and in so doing have lifted the gloom and doom from my life.

This part saddens me to no end, but I cannot any longer allow it to dictate my day to day life or future.  Time is finite.  I have way too much still to do and achieve without this worry.  Saying goodbye is never easy.  However, there is no other way.

To recap I haven't done all that much, but I have done much.

Hopefully, the job and my energies will settle in and I will be able to call upon Kim's talents once more to instigate phase 2 of the lounge room reorder.  This time it will be 'what is behind those cupboard doors'?  Will post those picture next time.

Well, I at least intend to.

Will not leave it so long next time till my next post.

Cheers to one and all.
Anita
x

Who came first! The Tortoise or the Hare?

Hi Guys,

Well we all know who won that race now, don't we! 

I have procrastinated throughout this whole last month regarding all things to do with decluttering. 

The finalising of the Will and then the settlement all took it's toll on me.  That and the weather suddenly turned decidedly icy cold.  Never bodes well for enthusiasm.

I am not sure which one I am.  The Tortoise?  Or the Hare?  More likely the Hare as I have run around and gotten nothing done.  Sound familiar?

I have been so busy with everything else except decluttering that I have decided that I resembled the Hare.  But how could I?  All that precious time, gone, wasted.

First off, the State Revenue Office sat on the Title for some weeks and finally stamped it 'non-dutable'.  Now that was a relief. 

Secondly, the settlement had to be booked in, which went like clock work last week.

Now the 2 recipients will receive their cheques and that will be the end of that chapter.  Done and dusted.  This also means all my debts are now consolidated into one home loan.  I can breathe once more.

There have been so many surprising incidental costs, which are still adding up and eating away at my so called buffer.  Well, I suppose I had that buffer for a reason, didn't I?  I am still waiting on one more cost before I start planning what to do first.  Heating in the house for the first time in years or the Hot Water Service.  Being that winter is upon us, I have no doubt heating will win out first.

I will also finally intern Mum and Dad's ashes out at the family cemetery plot. 

I plan to get an organiser in to help me with the kitchen and last part of the lounge room.  Along with a trusty gardener to get the triffids back in line. 

In the meantime, I have finally sorted through all the guff Centrelink had me do and have had a few job interviews.

As you can see I have had 'NO time for DECLUTTERING'!  Still actively being done in my brain however!

It is a nice feeling to know that these bricks and mortar within which I live now belong to me.  This big mess is now truly all mine.  Somehow, this does change the way I feel and it has been a relief to have the Will finished finally.  Bring on the new chapter.  No more bitterness.  No more negativity.  From here on in only sincere friendly people in my life.  I have released the few toxic persons from my family ranks and have let them go for my own health.  Incredibly satisfying moment and one that I am still savouring.

Goodbye crapola and Hello world.

I have a job interview today and it is looking very good.  Just to put a spanner into my plans this one is full time.  Yep, I better get a jiggle on with all my crapola then!

Zigis did get that 16th birthday bash at Luna Park and a good day was had by all.

The crew outside Luna Park 'just for fun' St. Kilda.

Da boys before being let loose.

Proud Mama.

Big sis.

That Carousel.

Aija and Keith organised a unique gift for Zigis.  They got a street sign made up in his name, which was made by the official company that makes all street signs for Victoria.  All we have to find now is a street or way to attach it to!

Way to go Zigis! 

Zigis was very happy to say the least.  He spent all day and well into the night with his mates.  The pain has been well worth it.

As for the garden, well now that I have a little cash on the side, I will have to get quotes and start doing one job at a time to get the garden back on track and more in line with LOW maintenance in mind.

I am ready to purge, but just don't have the energy to do it. 

Just called a professional organiser who is coming this Friday.  I will see how the first 4 or 5 hour block goes and may need to do more over a period of time.  Now I am excited.

Well, my work is done for today.  I like this 'let the fingers do the work' for you. 

Anyone who says money doesn't bring you happiness needs a serious reality check.  It certainly helps to bring comfort, stability and choice into the equation.

As for Kim who is coming to start my decluttering once more, I will get her to help me in the kitchen and lounge areas.  I think she is in for a big surprise.  Or not.  We shall see.  Hope I achieve what I want, which is a pleasant easy going home again.  One that reflects that lived in family feel like I used to have.  I can dream can't I?

Well folks there you have it.  Will take photos of the before and afters for you to see.  I guess we will attack it one section at a time.  Should be interesting.  Kind of scary allowing a total stranger to help you.  On the other hand it has less strings attached.  Hopefully soon this house will be liberated of the stuff that is consuming it and be a home once more within the next few months.

That next chapter has begun.

Will do a blog after her first visit.

Chookas for now,
Anita

ps... just breathe in breathe out... getting prepared for that next step... leap... jump... oh you know what I mean.

Avoidance! The natural enemy of a hoarder!

Hi Guys,

Now I don't mean to sound glum, but this 'decluttering' or 'purging' is the worst roller coaster ride I have ever been on.  It seems to be going on forever and ever. 

My positivity is taking a nose dive big time due to 'too' much time on my hands now!  Now this may sound like an oxymoron, but with more time comes 'avoidance'.  The less time you have the more you do and vise-versa.  And avoidance can happen or be achieved in so many ways, especially when the walls come crashing down around you.

Since quitting the 'love' job, I have been busy, but on everyone else but myself. 

First, I had to defrag myself from the treachery I just got out from under.  I have helped friends who don't have cars to get things done.  There have been events to attend and duties to perform outside of the home.  Then on top of all this I got the virus from hell!  All of which have taken me away from the essential important task at hand.  My home and getting the crap out of here!!!

I find myself at the door of Easter to only have sorted the lounge room somewhat and not enough to be properly utilised yet again for it's intended use. 

The definition of avoid is to shun, keep away from, refrain from, ditch, escape from, bypass, circumvent, dodge, duck, elude, evade, prevent, shirk, sidestep.  Clearly I am an expert avoider!

Opposite to the definition of avoid is embrace as in to approach, contact, confront, face (yeeks), find, pursue, seek out, solicit.  Or just do it!  Clearly I have ceased to embrace this.

However, my recent setbacks have affected me more than I care to admit. 

Allow me to go back to just after my last posting. 

I was advised at that time that I had the Title to Mum's house.  I had in my brain that it was being held at the Law firm that did my Mum's Will.  I called to state as such only to be told that in March 2008 I signed for the Title.  Why in their right mind would they allow 'ME' to do that!  There must have been a good reason.  None of which come to me right now.

Thinking of all the papers that have been thrown out since then I started to panic.  Remember, my passport was thrown out the very same way years before.  To get a replacement Title takes months and many hoops to be jumped through, so to say that I was beside myself was an understatement.

I asked the assistant lawyer to send me an example of the title via email and proceeded to rummage through more paperwork that day for hours till around midnight.  I tossee as I went through.  But no luck.  No Title.  I was spent.  I didn't sleep.  I received the email the next day and in it was also a reminder to look into any Safe Deposit Envelopes that I held at the bank.  Which I did.  Could it be there?

A very weary me got up the next morning and went to said bank and waited to look in this envelope that held many precious papers of family importance.  Documents dating back to the turn of the century... the one before that is!  I leaf through with my heart in my mouth taking my time and there at the bottom was a paper turned upside down and as I held my breath ever so hard, I turned it over to have relief spill through me as I saw the shiny emblem and the word Title. 

I raced said Title to the Law firm in the city that very day.  You would think that was it.  Hell no.  I had to sign all sorts of documents for the matter to be finalised.  Groan.  Where we are right now after several more hurdles being jumped over is that the Title is now with the people who decide all things Stamp Duty.  This can take weeks.  More groaning.  This also means my buffer could be gone up in Stamp Duty smoke and changes everything.  Hence, my worries.  Why cannot life be 'just simple' for me just once.  Not much to ask for me thinks.

I have to tell you something funny here.  I said thank you to the assistant lawyer for reminding me about the bank evelope.  To my surprise she said, 'you told Paul in March 2008 to put a note in the file to remind you when it was required in the future that the Title was in the said envelope and bank'!  Well, what a clever dickie was I to send myself a reminder from way back when, which turned out to be almost 4 years on.

I did get to sit with Paul and chat about Mum's wishes and how long it has taken in coming around.  We met in May 2007.  So long ago now.  He remembered her so fondly and stated what a clever person she was.  That she knew what her one daughter would do and countered it before it happened.  Paul also could not get over the depths my one sister went to to get me to bow to her demands.  Must say I had a good cry that day with all the memories flooding back from that time.  It was a healthy crying as I remembered what Mum set out to do while dying from cancer.  Whether this sister will take on Mum's message or not will be up to her.  I just know that Mum would be settled now knowing what she wanted and her wishes got done to the letter.

Now the wait creeps on.  I knew deep down setting out to finalise the Will would be frought with heartache and delays, but this really has sent me into a tailspin. 

See how easy it is to slide back.

In the meantime, I have been sending my Resume out left, right and centre.  Have had a few nibbles.  Hope I get something soon as that would settle me down somewhat.  Also, went to Centrelink (as I used to call them Centrestink) to advise of my altered circumstances and I will be going through more transition and will be in a state of flux for a few months yet to come there also.  I feel like all my tenpin bowling balls are all up in the air hovering over me and not knowing when they shall drop.  One by one or all at once.  Not a great feeling.  No wonder I got sick and avoidance set in.

With my positivity deminishing and being distracted with finalising the Will and getting the Home Loan sorted I felt like I was pushing uphill bigtime and getting very frustrated that time was dragging in this case.  I am so close to this chapter ending that it is agony getting there.

Due to this delay, I am in this limbo land until the last part of the Will is done and dusted.  Until such time, the Home Loan has also come to a complete halt.  I just hope the outcome will be doable.  I only accounted for so much and wish I had added an extra ten thousand now for the possibility that I may now have to pay the dreaded Stamp Duty.  The Title is now in the hands of the government department that decides such things and this could take weeks, which in turn makes this all very horrifying for me.  More delays.  Being that it is a gift and not bought they have to look into the legality and 'meaning' and intent of the Will to then ascertain who if any pays Stamp Duty and on what.  Very murky if you ask me and 'interpretation' can be skewed.  Afterall, they are into making money for the government.  I just hope I have calculated enough to cover any such contingency.

I have retreated into some of the same old patterns in order to avoid the elephant in the room due to my personal worries.  I mention this as this is what happens when life throws you these curve balls and if you are not yet strong enough to handle such events it can and will knock you down.  I was going so well there for a while that just like in sitcoms when it is all too wonderful something has to happens to knock you over and give you that massive wake up call.

One good thing to report.  The Red Light Camera fine that I got in error has been sorted and now going to the rightful party.

Here is the withdrawal...

A small victory in this case!

In the meantime, I have had to fork out a ton of money on my son's student transport card and on top of this I also promised him he would have a 16th birthday party as he really hasn't had one since before Mum died.  We have settled on 6 boys in all going to Luna Park with All Day ride access plus starting at Macca's for lunch and then they can ride to their hearts content till 8pm.  Going on the rides at night is the best.  Now with all these delays and potential extra costs I am now freaked out about money or lack thereof.  I know it will all pan out.  I just wish I had a crystall ball to know I will end up having enough. 

But the party will go ahead as we need some fun time as well.  So if we go down.  We go down as a family.  Together.

I will make an attempt at getting the lounge room at least in order by Easter end.  Also sit down and work out a Working Bee weekend on the garden as it really has been taken over by 'The Triffids'.

Here are some photos to show you how much the plants have truly taken over.

This is the side to the back yard, which needs to be totally cleared.

Next is a side view of the back yard.  The Magnolia bush... now tree has taken over the yard and needs a sharp trim back big time.

The is of the back door.  You can see steps there somewhere!

This is the other side of the house that I have hacked at several times and yet here it is - total takeover time!  You will see the water tanks on the side - just.

Now this is a high (POV) point of view above the water tanks.  The bush at the end is around 3 metres high and is now at gutter height!  On top of this there is a weed growing from one of the water tanks that you can see in the foreground.  Talk about a Triffids takeover!

All this had been cut back and it has gone buresque!  Just add water and look what happens!!!  It has gotten to the point that it is totally out of hand and I need help.  A lot will have to be trimmed right back and some bushes will need to be removed as they just get out of control too quickly. 

Mum always said I wouldn't cope with the garden.  Oh, how she knew.  We stood together in the backyard one day not long before she went into palliative and we both were shaking our heads and what was to be.  Mum was amused by all of this and she and Dad would be having a right laugh right now.  But, I wouldn't trade this part of the experience for anything.  Fond memories of my parents that I treasure.

As for the lounge room that has stuff dumped on one of the couches and so on.  There will be one unhappy camper and that will be Miss Kafups as I call her, otherwise known as Missy. 

Here she is in her 'new' and current favourite pozzie...

Not for long.  She will not be amused.

Last, but not least, I will have to work on my "stinkin' thinkin'" and turn that around as well.  When I am down is when I am  the least productive with getting rid of the 'STUFF' and finding time to do it.  It's not like I don't have the time is it now.  But such is the way when people are involved.  Anything can happen.  With those last three words I have to turn it from a negative to a positive.  No woe is me any more.  I have to pull myself up and just start.  As hard as that is to do, I shall find the strength from somewhere and do just that.  Make it happen.

In a way, by writing this 'blog', it will help me from going deep into my doldrums and get me back to being up again.  I have to remember my own advise and to be kind to myself as I don't want to make this situation worse than it already is.

I am desperately trying to be patient and cool as a cucumber!  So very hard to do.  Hope to report next time all is signed, sealed and delivered and that the next chapter of my life has begun.

Now off my butsky from the computer and on into the fray called 'the loungeroom'! 

Yes, folks!  I'm going in. 

Wish me luck and see you on the other side.

Cheers to you all
Anita

ps - Happy Easter to those to whom it matters.  As for all of you don't let life's trials and tribulations get in the way of your progress and if it does, then just enjoy your family and friends. 
Take care over the holidays folks.

Embracing change is hard to do!

Hi Guys,

Well, here I am thinking I have the job that I love that would last for a long time. At least that is what I thought.

Life has a way of throwing twists and turns at you and the last few weeks in my case has been no exception.

One day you are employed and the next you are not! 

But let's look at the silver lining.  I have got off my bum and now more active and less apathetic about what life can entail.  This will give me that much needed valuable time to really sort through the stuff.  I actually feel motivated in doing such.

I will go back a little in time so you can better see my picture. 

At the conference that I attended in January, it was apparent then and there, that there was a lot more politics to this company than I first realised.  I also discovered that the company was very top heavy.  Does anyone remember the song Dean Martin sang 'Too Many Chiefs And Not Enough Indians'?  Well, it certainly was the case here.

The man who hired me was fantastic and I so enjoyed working for him.  Communication flowed and the support was freely given.  You knew what was happening and was well informed.  However, just before Christmas he mysteriously dissappeared.  I suspect he was shafted out of his postion.  His sales style was more along the lines of mine which is to develop relationships for longevity.  It became obvious at the Conference that the company was now heading more along the lines of aggressive sales techniques and expectations.  And in this current economic climate not a good move if you ask me.

Being that he hired me I knew I would have a target on my back.  It didn't take long for this to happen and certain big wigs started making comments and finally within weeks one of them, the General Manager no less, from Sydney, came to see me.  I sat there at this meeting, watching my immediate boss here in Melbourne tell blatant lies to save her own bacon and I did pipe up at this stage stating that the figures they were going by where inaccurate, at which point the GM said that doesn't matter. 

I was floored at this attitude.  Flabberghasted even. 

I learnt at this meeting more people where being employed (not sales) but more bosses that will have to be paid for from somewhere.  They were not interested in facts and twisted the inaccuracies to suit their purpose.  I knew that no matter what I said at this point it would just sound like an excuse, as they were not taking anything of fact on board.  I played along to get more precious time in order for the recent home loan application to go through.  This home loan meant that even out of work I would be able to get by.  Tough, but get by regardless. 

I wont go into the ins and outs of the situation, other than to say, they felt they were in the drivers seat and had total control over me.

I worked out that I had at least 7 bosses above me.  I mean, how many does it take to make a decision!
 
I was given 2 weeks to 'improve' and another meeting was called 9 days on (looks like they cannot add) via telephone conference.  30 minutes prior to that conference call I tendered my resignation along with my reasons why.  I was factual and professional and to the point.  They were floored.  I had gesumped them. 

I ended up speaking to the GM the next day (last Friday) who had convinced herself that the figures did not matter.  Now that is just not logical in my book.  I relayed that I could not work for a company that does not work on accurate figures when making vital decisions and that where this company was now heading was somewhere that I had no interest in taking that journey with them.  I do not see aggressive sales as desireable nor ideal and would rather have my integrity stay intact than go there.

This GM stated she woud take on board my comments, but I could tell they would rather convince themselves they were right at all costs than fix the cancer within their ranks.  Shame really.

She told me they had a discussion as what to do and had all decided to release me and that today was my final day.  This was at noon.

At 3.40pm the very same day my Mortgage Broker called and advised me that my loan application had been unconditionally approved.  Talk about a close shave.  The eleventh hour.  Or who could have scripted this better?  Real life or a sitcom writer!  My life is never dull of this I am sure.

Even though I resigned I know I will miss my job.  I love what I do.  But I have to find the right company.  As they say in the fairy tales, I will have to kiss a few toads to find my frog prince.  Onward in my quest for the perfect fit.

I am sure my last place of employment will keep growing, but they have the serious potential to implode.  I hope they look at the things that have been said and address the cancer from within their own ranks.  But I highly doubt that.

All I know is I saved myself from a very toxic situation.

As shell shocked as I was, the next day, Saturday, my sons Dad arrived with a queen size (second hand) bed for him.  My son and I removed everything out of his room.  After removing all the dead bodies, lolly and chip packets and lord knows what and vacuuming, it was looking half decent once more.  We found all sorts of things.  That DVD that was missing.  All the missing socks and so on.  Nothing like a good old purge.

I told my boy to only put back what he wanted.  After many bags of rubbish and a few bags for the charity bins and several hours later his room was trasformed.  He woke up in a boys room and will go to sleep in a teenagers room.  There are still areas to address, but it was a huge improvement and one that I could see my son will totally appreciated.  A teenagers retreat.

This now meant I now have 2 mattresses under the carport and more stuff on the now growing junk pile.

I am beginning to look more and more like Steptoe & Son by the day.

Here are my growing collection of mattresses that you cannot get rid of for love or money...

And not far the ever growing junk pile...

Not a good look, but will be removed as soon as I can organise someone with a trailer to take to the tip.

On the Monday I had asked a friend to come and help fix my now very sad and sorry and completely dilapidated letter box.

Here is what the old letter box ended up looking like...

Very sad looking indeed.  The door had gone and the roof collapsed and there was tape holding the pole together.  I think I can safely say this letter box had done it's job and now had to go.  My postie will be pleased if no one else!

I had found and bought a suitable letter box via a charity shop at a pinch of the price without the pole and all I had to buy was a pole on which to sit said letter box on.  I did pick up a letter box sometime back on a pole with the concrete still attached and had visions of knocking the concrete off, but my friend said after giving it a few blows that it just wasn't worth it.  Looks way better now and all I have to get is a padlock for it and we are done.

Here is the new one being put into situ by my friend John...

Here is how it looks from my porch area... Isn't she a beaut!

My postie will be one happy chappy!

Like I have said before, you look worse while you go through this process, but you are on your way to having that vision burst through.

Will have to contact the council to find out if they will do a one off collection for me.  But wont hold my breath.  Otherwise, it will have to all wait till September for the next collection if I cannot find someone to help take it to the tip.

Today I intend to start work on getting my lounge room sorted again with all that I dumped in there from what I had tossed out of my room when I got the new mattress and regain the use of my sanctuary.  It all takes time and effort and above all else motivation.  Sadly time I didn't have, but happily do now.  Effort is not an issue as much.  But motivation!  Well, that is an entirely different matter all together.  It is easy to get side tracked.  Something I will have to keep a watch out for.

Each day I intend to do something and this way in no time at all I should be that closer to my vision.

Being that it is Autumn I want to organise after Easter a weekend for a few of my friends to come and help me cut back the overgrowth that really has got out of hand, weed, plant the drought hardy clumping plants that I have been slowly buying up with a BBQ at the end of it.  Along with the help of my children we should be done in no time at all.  That way I will be able to get the tree loppers in and it wont cost as much.  Well, am hoping that that will be the case.

Lastly, remembering my now motto, 'onward and outward a little at a time everyday'!

Chiz
Anita - back to looking for work while I work!

Today is 29 February 2012!

Hi Guys,

Really don't have much to report other than wanting to post today due to the 'special' date! 

29 February 2012

Wont be able to do this again for another 4 whole years till 2016!  Then, if we really want a great date what about 2020!!!  OK getting ahead of myself here... maybe I should just concentrate on getting rid of the stuff before 2020. Or better still 2016!  I hope to be 'done' well before then.

I haven't had much time to do much of anything really as my boss who hired me left or who knows what from the company I work for prior to Christmas under a cloud of secrecy.  Since the conference in mid January it appear we have gone from a 'team' to 'individual' performances and guess who is in the firing line.  Yep, little ol' me.  Being that the Howard government made it possible for employers to 'get rid of' or 'cull' at will prior to 12 months employment for staff under 100 without cause and 6 months for over means I do not have a leg to stand on and have been head down, bum up and trying to stay under the radar.  Looks like I may have failed as one of the big wigs is coming down 'to chat'!  Now that certainly doesn't make my heart beat any better.

So my plans may be gesumped before I can complete what I have set out to do and that is combine all debts into one low home mortgage and finalise my Mum's Will prior to the set date of 28 October 2013.  If I don't, then I will have to sell this place regardless and will have no choice in the matter.  I was hoping, just once, for things to go my way, but the economy, local and global has other ideas in store for me by the look of things.

So, my Mum's wishes for me to have some 'stress free time' hasn't really happened.

Have gone through papers and all the stuff that I dumped in the lounge room when the mattress came and have gotten half way through, but that has come to a complete halt now until I know where I stand with this job bizo and trying to get a low mortgage before the possibility of loosing it happens.  After which time I can then concentrate on looking for another job or convince the current bosses to cut my days till things improve instead of letting me go.

The garden is looking like crap and have started to get cards in the now falling apart letterbox for tree loppers etc and have no spare cash to do such until I know what will be the ultimate outcome with my 'very' precarious job.

When I feel stressed like this, I tend not to be able to cull as well as I normally do.  You go into this mindset of what if I need this one day and if I throw it out or give it away and then I need one again, what then!  Better not, so as 'NOT' to waste what precious little money I have.  You start to save things for that 'rainy' day.  That time when you 'may' need it. 

This uncertainty certainly 'DOES NOT' help me at 'ALL'.

Wish me luck guys in getting the 'low' mortgage through first before getting the heave-ho.  Or just keeping my job and getting the mortgage.

Life has to be simpler than all this palava.

Might just go curl up and watch sad movies and cry. 

No, must try to get through this hurdle as well.  Let's see where the wind takes me this time.  Hope it ends up better than what I am currently anticipating.

Now if anyone needs anything I am selling heaps of things.  All you have to do is request.  You can find me at anita.sulcs@gmail.com or Facebook.  Well, worth a try, isn't it?  Have nothing to lose.  Oh, yes, the job.  Let's try and keep the job at all costs. 

Maybe, I can say this to my boss on Monday....

Or...

Not sure if that one would work?  Do you?

Or I could just do some....

In the end I will just have to remember this and go with the flow...



And with that 'motto' in hand, I will bid this 29th day of February 2012 'farewell'.

My plans are to get on top of this sillyness so I can get on top of my 'blinkin' stuff'!

Cheers for now and will just have to 'keep on smiling'.

Anita

ps... hopefully still gainfully employed the next time I 'Blog'!