CRY ME A RIVER.

Hi Guys,

New year, new day, new fresh start for many.  Happy New Year to you all.

As for my decluttering... well on my way now, but not quite there yet unfortunately.

This year is going to be my year I have decided.  Being both a Goat astrologically and that this coming year as of 19 February and born in the year of the Goat for the Chinese astrological calendar.  This has got to be a good sign.  Double Goatdom for me.

So, good things are going to happen as far as I can see.

If I say it.  It will happen.

I have realised looking back and taking stock once more that I have literally cried me a river in the last 9 years.

And the tears have streamed down for a lot of that time as well as since I have had this blog going to help keep me motivated to get to the bittersweet end.  That end will be when I can safely say, 'I'm done'.


 


The tears have flowed and no more so than today.

Why today?

Well, I finally got to that part, around the side of the house, that I knew would be fraught with horrors for me and just knew that there would be more tears involved.

I wasn't wrong.




As for what has happened since last I wrote.  Well, there is good news,

I made it to Christmas with the home intact.  I am still not out of the woods.  But I made it through when I thought all was doom and gloom.  It has given me hope and that much needed extra time to sort through more of the stuff to get to my next and hopefully more carefree and enjoyable chapter of my life's journey and adventures.  I would like to be young and healthy enough to enjoy them rather than endure them if I can.

With that in mind I have been madly purging, tossing and sorting much more than I could ever have hoped for.  A few friends at different times have come over to lend a hand and that makes it go faster and more out that door.  I have to say yet again how blessed I am with the best and how much I love them all and that a simple thank you is just not enough and will have to do something one day to show them how much I have appreciated all the help I have received so far.

                         

I have sorted through papers and I have sorted what was in the corridor finally and now tackling the dreaded side of the house.

Once I have dealt with that, I will then deal with the last of the horror places, which will be the shed.

After that it is just what's left under the carport and the attic, but that is not so bad, as that means I am on the home stretch.

In the meantime, seeing so much of my stuff in ruin from damp and the weather has saddened me to no end.  Some things where fine and yet others were just beyond salvation.

Time and mother nature has decided for me.  I have to accept that.  But the tears fell.

             

I cry for many reasons.  Sadness above all else.  I cannot not cry.  It just comes.





Good news is I am slowly getting to that place of being closer to the finish line.  When I do move, I certainly do not want to move all the stuff that is no longer usable or needed.

But the worst is almost over.

I can see the home stretch ahead of me.... I chose to think positively and not negatively!

Once I have the shed done the absolute worst of the worst side of this journey will have been faced and dealt with.

Most of my nightmares will have been faced.  Whether I have handled it well or not wont matter in the future.  What will matter is the quality of life I will have and that I will have broken the handing down of this undone work with my generation.  I will have saved this hell from my children in their old age.

In the corridor there where things that brought up so much pain.  I was able to let that wash over me and get rid of the pain along with the items that had that pain attached to it.  Hard for some to understand, but we all feel emotions in so many different ways that it is not the 'what' that causes the pain that should be considered, but the emotion itself.  No matter what the emotional pain is caused by we all experience it at some time or stage of our lives and our personal triggers can vary.  This just happens to be mine.

In the meantime I will continue to wish upon a star and keep on plugging on the best I can so that this particular horror story has an end and a happy one at that no matter how exhausted and bedraggled I may feel.

Now out the backyard to sort through what has to be binned and what can be salvaged if much at all.  So not looking forward to this.  But I must.

Reminding myself to breathe in and breathe out and be kind to myself.

Hopefully next time I will be on the home stretch.  That's me making great strides towards that finish line.

 


And counting my blessings.

Cheers all,
Anita

ANOTHER YEAR COMES TO AN END & STILL FEEL LIKE LIVING ON QUICK SAND!

Hi Guys,


Just a quickie to keep you all updated.

Not much has been done in the way of decluttering the 'stuff' for some weeks now.  Have had the opportunity to work on the election just gone by for the body that takes care of the voting process. Very interesting to see in action and glad to know that our votes are taken care of.  Hence, this has taken me out of the loop of getting things done.




On the plus side, the kilos are slowly melting away, which will in turn help me with my movement, in order to get more done, as well as add to my general overall well being.

On top of this, I have secured a casual part-time come office/business admin/social media/marketing/etc position for the next 13 weeks with a review at the end of that time period.

I will also continue with my 'JUST CALL ANITA' bookings and get onto posting more eBay items to keep that 'D' Day moving forward.  Then there are my book/scripts I have to seriously do some work on.

It really does feel like living on quick sand at the moment as the goal posts keep moving as each opportunity comes along.  Little by little, I am making headway towards early May.  Still a long way yet to that day, but getting there all the same.

Even if or when I get to next May, I have started rethinking about where it is I should live.  I may as well try and have a 'nice' lifestyle while I am able to relatively enjoy it.  If I am to get my writing done, I would like a nice environment in which to achieve that.  Will keep you posted as to where I will land and when.

At least for the time being I have till late February.  There is still a shortfall, but not as huge as before and is the reason why I have to continue selling off my 'stuff'.  And that in itself is not a bad thing either.

I have taken to saying that I have cancelled Christmas.  What I really mean is, I have cancelled anything on the side of costing money part of Christmas.  The small family have agreed to not buy presents and not do the massive dinner, which we normally have after the Christmas Eve church service.  This year it will be simple as.



I do look forward to this pleasure once a year as we never have all the little extra's throughout the year, but this one year we can make do and have the following to look forward to knowing I will more than likely still have a home in which to celebrate in.



Here is an old favourite joke I heard from when I was very very young.  My darling Dad used to say this one all the time.  It just never got old to me.



Family and friends first.



Food and prezzies can come another year.




Well, just in case I get sidetracked or too busy to post again before the year ends, have a great Christmas to all those who celebrate and all stay safe over the holiday period.

Make sure you enjoy and keep on smiling.
                          


Just sharing a few images that I particularly liked.


    


    


I may get to write once more before the end of this year, but have a gut feeling that it wont be till the start of 2015.  So, remember, be kind to yourself during this time and the process of decluttering and just to breathe.

Inhale the love.  Exhale the rubbish.

Just do what you can as you can.

Merry Christmas and hugs to one and all.
Anita

'D' DAY IS JUST AROUND THE CORNER! WILL IT BE ENOUGH?

Hi Guys,

Just a brief one this time round.

Last time I wrote I was hurtling towards the unknown.  Next week is D DAY week.  Will I have done enough to hang on?  This time next week I will have a better idea as to the answer of that particular question.

That is when I will find out exactly what will be 'not' coming in to pay for all that goes 'out' and how massive that 'shortfall' will be that I have been fearing now for many many months and what impact that will mean!

Ergo, 'home' or 'no home'.

First off, had that Market day.  I actually did better than I expected and had ever done before and got rid of quite a lot.  But, gee, what a lot of work for so little when you get to the end.  No matter, it still all helped in the end.  It meant just that bit extra down on the first high interest smaller debt.

Here are some shots from the day.  Starting out with a filled to the brim car and my trusty mascot dragon in the front.

What made the day so enjoyable other than actually getting to clear some of my 'stuff' is the other market stall holders and how friendly they are, along with a few friends coming to say hello.  Made my day.

I also have done some driving, mainly airport runs and a few Spring Horse Racing trips in the mix that has also helped via Uber and my personal contacts.

Here is my POV (point of view) while waiting watching the planes land.

And this is a 360 degree photo from my office.

Through sheer determination and hard yakka, some very dear friends, my daughter and future son-in-law and son, the smaller of the 2 debts is almost gone.  This does not mean I am out of the woods just yet, but it does create a very very small breathing space for now.

Will know next week if it will be enough to help keep me going under, even if it does mean it is still off the smell off the smell off the smell off an oily rag.  I just may save my home yet.

Last, is the eBay items.  My goodness what a palava that is.  Strike rate is less then 50% of what you place selling with first time round generally a dud and the waiting and the redoing and the queries and the postage at the countless post office trips and the oh my goodness gracious me all the other stuff that one has to do to sell one simple item for next to nix.  Which translates into "oh so time consuming", and again, hardly worth all the effort it takes to put together, but it has meant slowly getting that smaller debt down.  And for that I am truly grateful.

Just taking one minute at a time for the time being when I find myself starting to over think about the future.  Brighter days just have to be ahead.

Next will be taking more photos with a friend over the weekend to keep up the momentum with the selling off the 'stuff'.  That and taking some larger items to an Auction House and hope to goodness they sell.

Will let you all know soon enough how much I have achieved.  Whether it is enough to get me through Christmas till early next year.  Or, to get me through to early May, which is a point I am trying to get to where finances can be rearranged to help get further along.  Or, miracle of all miracles I have saved the day enough in order to stay put just for those few more years that I had planned toall along.

Fingers crossed folks as the timing means all the difference to what kind of next and final chapter I get to live out.

Ciao for now folks
Anita